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Across the Universe (2007)
Genre: Musical; Director: Julie Taymor
Stars: Jim Sturgess, Evan Rachel Wood

It’s so hard to review this film. Whenever I’m asked what I think about this movie, I can’t give a straight answer. It’s not bad but it’s not great, either. What I’m sure of is that I enjoyed it immensely. 99.9% of that — music. If you love the Beatles‘ songs, you’ll enjoy it. But that’s beside the point. We all know that films are not just about music.

The problem with Across the Universe is that it doesn’t have much of a story. Or, there are too many subplots. Unlike many musicals today, this Taymor film is cluttered and in total disarray. The filmmakers obviously wanted to squeeze all the Beatles songs they could into the film that everything is just all over the place. Loopholes everywhere.

Yes, there is no other treatment that best suits this concept other that surrealism but it’s a bit over the top, too. Nevertheless, it’s a cinematic feast (bordering on visual masturbation). There are a lot of memorable scenes. Excellent cinematography, production design and editing. It’s not the best musical in the world but it is tremendously entertaining. 3.5

…

Atonement (2007)
Genre: Drama; Director: Joe Wright
Stars: Keira Knightley, James McAvoy, Saoirse Ronan

After watching Atonement, I was reminded of Brokeback Mountain. Not that there are gay cowboys in this film but I muttered “All that hype for this?” Don’t get me wrong. The film isn’t bad. It’s excellent. It’s just that I don’t think it deserves all the buzz that has been around it. I don’t know, maybe I just expected too much. I had been waiting for this film for, like, forever. I remember feeling the same way about Brokeback two years ago. I set the bar too high. After watching it, I immediately declared my desire for Crash to snatch the Oscar.

Going back to Atonement, it is great. Screenplay, production design, cinematography and musical score — stunning. It kinda tends to be a little dragging at times but it’s tolerable. Nice, nice, nice. But, ugh, I’m still disappointed. Hehe. Too much expectations, darn it. 4.5

…

A Mighty Heart (2007)
Genre: Drama; Directors: Michael Winterbottom
Stars: Angelina Jolie, Dan Futterman

I admit, unlike Atonement, I wasn’t really expecting much from this film. I just wanted to see if Angelina Jolie deserved the Oscar snub. And, er, after seeing it, yeah, Jolie not being nominated is a travesty. But heck, the film is bigger than Angelina. I LOVE IT. Simple. Piercing. Poignant. It tells the story of a French wife excruciatingly waiting for the release of her husband Daniel Pearl, a Jewish American journalist captured by terrorists in Pakistan. What’s amazing about it is that I knew exactly how it would end because heck, everyone knows about what happened to Daniel Pearl, but I was still moved. The simplicity of the film is its key asset. It just revolves around a desperate woman’s staggering dedication and struggle to “wait” for a potentially devastating “uncertain.” Compelling. Riveting. Breathless. 4.0

Status: Asthmatic.
Music: All My Loving - The Beatles

Remakes are Philippine television’s new trend. Be it a local movie, a Latin American telenovela or an Asian series — name it — as long as it’s appealing, either ABS-CBN2 or GMA7 will pick it up, lay it on the table and turn it into something horrible. Well, not always.

I don’t know where I stand exactly on this. These remakes may not be very healthful for our media industries — I mean, come on, we can come up with something brilliantly original. In fact, we already have — but hey, it’s really interesting to anticipate how they will improve or mess up the original concept. The most exciting part on the part of the viewers is to see if the new cast can actually match that of the original.

Here are some of the remakes yet to hit our boobtubes and the rumored actors / actresses to play the lead roles, along with my comments and suggestions.

…

RUBI (ABS-CBN)

Country of Origin: Mexico
Plot: Rubí is a beautiful, charismatic young woman from a working-class background. She is studying at a university because of her sister’s great efforts. Rubí is best friends with Maribel, a wealthy young woman with a small defect in her leg. Rubí eventually meets Maribel’s boyfriend Hector and his best friend Alejandro. A much darker truth lies inside of Rubí. She is driven by a dark ambition that will stop at nothing to get what she wants, and what she wants is to escape from poverty and be wealthy.

Who? Who? Who?

They say: Angelica Panganiban, Wendy Valdez, Alessandra de Rossi

I say: Kristine Hermosa. Angelica or Alex would be great, too, but I can really imagine Kristine Hermosa as Rubi, ang bidang kontrabida. Kristine has been typecast as a naive poor girl whose face is always mistaken for a kitchen sink by her antagonists. It’s time for the vengeance of the century and a career makeover. But puhleaze, more acting workshops for her! But heck, she’s so right for this role. I’m more excited to see this one than Betty La Fea.

…

MY GIRL (ABS-CBN)

Country of origin: South Korea
Plot: Jasmine is an imposter, proficient in English, Chinese, and Japanese, while Julian is the second generation heir of a big corporation. Because of his grandfather’s illness, he is forced to ask Jasmine to act as his long-lost cousin so that his grandfather’s last wish can be fulfilled. Therefore, they are both bound in a lie so that no-one in the family knows the truth.

Who? Who? Who?

They say: Kim Chiu and Gerald Anderson

I say: Maja Salvador or Toni Gonzaga. I like Kim but I just wish she could act. Maja and Toni act a whole lot better and I’m sure either could pull off a swindler role. If their only basis for casting Kim is that she’s chinita (thus matching the Oriental cheverness of the project), come on, that’s so shallow. But then again, Kimerald has a massive fan base. Ratings matter.

For Julian, I really think that Zanjoe Marudo is the top man for the job. Sam Milby would be good, too. Hey, Julian’s character doesn’t really require much acting.

…

YO SOY BETTY, LA FEA (ABS-CBN)

Country of Origin: Colombia
Plot: Although Betty graduated Magna Cum Laude with a Bachelor’s of Economy and has a Master’s degree in Finance, and speaks both English and French fluently, she has been unable to secure an interview in any job because, as she claims, her ugly picture ruins her otherwise impressive resume. Tired of her unsuccessful search for a job that would match her education and experience, she decides to apply for a job as secretary to the president of a fashion design company called Eco Moda.

Who? Who? Who?

They say: Regine Velasquez, Sarah Geronimo, KC Concepcion or Bea Alonzo

I say: Bea Alonzo. Regine is too old. Sarah is too young. KC is too rich (hehehe). Besides, an “ugly” role is no stranger to Bea. She portrayed Katrina Argos, an unattractive geek, on Kaytagal Kang Hinintay, albeit for a very short period. (Katrina bloomed eventually into a beautiful law student.) Bea is perfect for the role. Perfect.

*images courtesy of peyups.com, pinoyexchange.com and pep.ph
**plots courtesy of wikipedia

Jordin Sparks is making it BIG. “Tattoo,” the first single off her debut album, peaked at #8 on the US Billboard Hot 100 chart, while her latest release “No Air” currently sits at a comfortable #6.

Now, I wonder, where are those people who spat on Jordin’s win, claiming that Blake Lewis would sell much better post-American Idol? Hmmm. You can choke now. Hehe. (Kidding.)

Don’t get me wrong, I like Blake, too. It’s just that, you know… I told you so.
image courtesy of the-protagonist.net

Status: LOL.
Music: Don’t Leave Me This Way - Ramiele Malubay

Did you know that Mariah Carey released a single called “Ken Lee?” No? Doesn’t ring a bell? Then let this Bulgarian Idol aspirant enlighten you with one of Mimi’s greatest songs. (Plamen, I’m gonna need you to translate this. )

And then we go back to where all this Idol mania started — the United Kingdom. Yes, that’s “X Factor” but you’ll also see Paula Abdul here as a hysterical guest judge. Move over, Madonna.

“America has delusional people, but honey, so does your country.”
— Paula Abdul to Simon Cowell

You got that right, Paula. But stop the damn laughing. Please? Please? Hahaha.

The Kite Runner (2007)
Genre: Drama; Director: Marc Forster
Stars: Khalid Abdalla, Zekeria Ebrehimi, Ahmad Khan Mahmidzada

Watching this movie is very much like flying a kite. When the kite takes off, it gets so high and exciting. The film can be divided into three parts; the first of which is brilliant. It revolves around the friendship of two Afghan boys. I’ve never been touched by a movie in a long time. It’s truly heartwarming and piercing at the same time. However, somewhere along the way, the string of the kite snaps and everything comes crashing down. The second and third parts of the film are utterly disappointing. I really wish they did not jump onto another period. The story of the two boys can stand alone.

Technically, it’s fantastic, too. Quite believable production design. Impressive cinematography. I didn’t really notice anything about the score or sound (which is a good thing, I guess). It’s a good film.

3.5

…

3:10 to Yuma (2007)
Genre: Western; Director: James Mangold
Stars: Russell Crowe, Christian Bale

I’m not really a fan of the Western genre but I really, really enjoyed watching this film. I admit, I only decided to see it because of my Christian Bale but I didn’t expect much from the movie itself. Surprisingly, it was one hell of a ride. I was literally gripping on the edge of my seat. Never a dull moment. I felt like I was traveling with the characters and that anytime, some gay cowboy (redundant, I know) would shoot me. It is really effective. Not to mention the superb performances by Bale and Crowe. The ending isn’t as moving as the filmmakers might have intended it to be. In fact, it was kinda lame. Ehehe. Anyway, awesome, awesome sound design, editing, production design and cinematography. Really enjoyable.

…

The Eye (2008)
Genre: Horror; Directors: David Moreau, Xavier Palud
Stars: Jessica Alba

I like watching horror films at the cinemas because I love screaming inside the theatre. But this film— It’s terrible. All I could let out were my expressions of disappointment. Not even a single “waaah.” This movie is not creepy or scary. It relies heavily on the element of surprise and not fear. It relies heavily on sound to freak out its audience and not the story. I didn’t enjoy it. Everything is forgettable. I can’t pick a single scene that gave me goosebumps. It’s like a one-night stand. Everything feels good at the moment. But once you step out of the theatre, there’s nothing you would remember. Unlike “The Ring,” “The Others,” or other contemporary horror films, it won’t haunt you once the film is over. There’s nothing to remember. And mind you, I haven’t even seen the original Hong Kong movie. Awful horror flick. Waste of time. Waste of money.

1.0

*gif icons courtesy of myemo.com

Status: Dead.
Music: Falling Slowly - Glen Hansard and Marketa Irglova

Ladies and gentlemen, introducing Janina San Miguel (Bb. Pilipinas World 2008). But before you hit the play button, please be aware that the following videos are deadly. Really.

And I thought nothing could beat this:

That’s our answer to Miss South Carolina — Miss Teen USA 2007.
Beauty pageant candidates these days. Tsk tsk.
Oh Gawd. I’m speechless.
And NO. Not all Filipinas are like them.

(But in fairness, whoever said we should judge a person according to his/her proficiency in English?)

Status: All right now.
Music: You’re So Vain - Brooke White, All Right Now - David Cook

Me with my cousins. Second pic: Yep, that’s me, leftmost. Gawd, I’ve just noticed that I was holding a green sausage-shaped balloon. Was that a sign? A foreshadowing? Haha.

Exactly a year ago, my family had a little dinner party. We invited some relatives and friends and had some fun. But that’s about it. Nothing really special.

Two years ago, I was so sick. But I was able to travel from Batangas to Manila, and meet some of my friends at the university. I planned to watch Pride and Prejudice with Josh, but I backed out the last minute because my body couldn’t withstand my aching joints and terrible fever. When I felt a little better hours later, I decided to just push through with the movie thing but because Josh couldn’t make it that night, Andre joined me instead. We spent the rest of the night at Figaro.

Three years ago, Josh gave me a Kitchie Nadal album, and we had lunch at Oz Cafe — my treat. We stayed there longer than we intended to. That night, I had dinner with Ayn. I can’t remember where, but I know I gave her a treat.

Six years ago, I saw a movie in a theatre in Lemery with my girlfriend back then, Michi, and some of my friends. Again, I can’t remember what movie we watched that day. But I know I was really, really happy. (It was Pearl Harbor pala.)

Twelve years ago, my mum threw a very lavish party for me at our place in Batangas. Most of my classmates and teachers were present. It was one of the most expensive parties my mum had ever thrown.

Twenty-two years ago, a midwife was pulling me out of my mother’s womb as my Daddy watched. It was a very bloody day.

Yep! Today I turned 22! Happy Birthday to ME!

Honestly, this is the first time since High School that I really anticipated my birthday.

… Read the rest of this entry »

Status: God himself could not contain us.
Music: One Last Song - Josiah Leming

I was just browsing through my files and I couldn’t help but snicker at the articles I had written in the past months: medical packaging, bungee cargo nets, pimp canes, folding cutting tables and oh, get this, industrial vinyl extrusions.

Five months ago, I started working as a web writer for my current employer. Although the company is despicable in all sense of the word, I am proud to say that our team’s client is anything but. To be honest, never has the thought of staying here this long entered my mind. But yeah, I’ve been here for five months and I seem to be counting some more.

I remember posting this on my third day at work:

My friends have been asking me how I find my new job as a writer. They ask me if it’s fulfilling. And of course, I have a default answer. “I don’t need a fulfilling job right now. The only job that will give me fulfillment is being a diplomat. And until I become one, I don’t need to feel fulfilled. I just need to feel happy.”

Surprisingly, right now, I feel both happy and fulfilled. The job turned out to be the best training that any type of writer could ever get. On my first day here, I was required to write about romantic love. It was probably the easiest topic any writer as hopeless romantic as me could get. Then the next days brought me diverse topics ranging from GPS dog tracking to jock itch to hoist brakes. Who cares about hoist brakes? Exactly.

I even wrote about how cozy hotels and how fantastic restaurants in Omaha are. Oh yes, Omaha is a nice city. But it would’ve been nicer had I actually been there.

Some of the topics, I’d never even heard of before. Sometimes, resources were scarce; thus, I had to squeeze so much creative juice from the deepest recesses of my brain, which used to contain only a little perversions and a lot of arrogance.

Read the rest of this entry »