My Achy-Breaky-Flirty Tonsils

Status: Way better.
Music: Feelin’ So Good | Jennifer Lopez

The past few weeks have been a bitch-ass on me. I struggled with tonsilitis, giving me hellish fever and excruciating time eating. For two weeks, I couldn’t get out of bed. The only time I went out of the house was when I decided to see a doctor. After all, this was my fourth tonsilitis this year and my usual meds didn’t seem to work this time. Ah, damn illness loves me so.

Since our family doctor was somewhere in the South celebrating summer, I chose to visit a hospital. My mum went with me and yes, I let her (because that meant she’d be the one payin’ the bills).

When I approached the front desk, it suddenly dawned on me that it was the hospital my ex-girlfriend works at. I prayed she won’t show up (coz I looked hideous). Thank God she did not. Instead, when I entered the emergency room (which also serves as the hospital’s clinic), I was welcomed by a young doctor — A HOTTT DOCTOR.

Life is pretty fair after all, I thought. Haha.

The nurses took the usual stuff — temperature, blood pressure, etc. And then the hot doctor (probably in his late 30s) started asking questions about my condition. He seemed puzzled that I had been taking the right meds but they weren’t working. And then he asked, “Have you been smoking?”

Thank God my mum was busy texting, she didn’t hear a thing. I asked her if she could just wait for me outside because hey, I’m 22.

After kicking my mum out of the room, I told the doctor that I had been smoking. Like any sane doctor, he asked me to stop. He then asked me to open my mouth coz he needed to take a look at my swollen throat. His brows met.

Me: Is it bad?
Doc: Let’s just say I couldn’t see your tonsils. They’re covered with pus.
Me: I’ll take that as “bad.”
Doc: What have you been shoving down your throat? (Rhetorical)
Me: You have no idea.

I grinned. He snickered. Haha. Then he placed his hands on my neck, just below my jaw and started feeling my swollen whatever.

Doc: Does it hurt when you swallow?
Me: Depends on what I swallow.
Doc: Haha. What else is there to swallow other than food?
Me: I meant, it depends on whether what I swallow is hot or cold. Cold, hurts big time. Hot, doesn’t.

He then told me what foods I should be eating and avoiding. And I realised, this hot creature is saving my life. Haha.

Doc: I’ll prescribe you some lozenge. It’s like strepsils…
Me: I know what a lozenge is, doctor.
Doc: (unmindful) It’s like strepsils. Just that it numbs your throat so it won’t hurt when you swallow. Whatever it is that you swallow.
Me: I need that. Badly.

He laughed a little. He then handed me the prescription and ran through it. I couldn’t focus. He was just sooo cute. He’s my McDreamy, haha. I wondered how it would be like to be loved by a doctor. Haha. I was pulled back to earth when he said, “…And quit smoking.”

When I got out of the hospital, I gave my mum the prescription. She asked, “what did he say?”

I answered, “That I MUST come back for a follow-up.” Haha.

images courtesy cartoonstock.com and altham.com

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