SIR HUBERT

On the way to the Subterranean River Park, we were being briefed by our Tour Guide. He was telling us many interesting things about Palawan. One of us, itago na lang natin sa pangalang Sir Hubert, asked, “San magandang mamalengke dito sa Puerto Princesa?”

At sumagot si Tour Guide, “Sa palengke po.”

Tama nga naman.

KAT

One of my officemates was raving about the places they visited on the third day. Itago na lang natin sya sa pangalang Ma. Katrina Larida. “Grabe, ang ganda talaga sa Crocodile Farm! Andami-daming crocodiles!”

Ay friend, sana naman madaming crocodiles dun bilang crocodile farm sya.

REEN

Yoshke: Reen! Help! Gaaaah! I think I’m falling in love with an animé character!
Reen: Gagu! You’re asking the wrong person. I’m married to one!

REEN’S 2ND YEAR P.E. TEACHER

2nd year PE teacher: “Would you please pick up the pieces of DIRT!”
Reen: Ah eh ma’am medyo mahirap isa-isahin ang alikabok.

YOSHKE

Naalala ko tuloy nung one time nung college, nagrereport ako sa Kasaysayan 100:

“…So kung may nagaganap na Industrial Revolution sa England, may French Revolution naman sa France…”

Tas naisip ko… Teka, parang may mali.

*TING*

Oo nga naman, malamang sa France ang French Revolution. Buti na lang nabawi ko kaagad. Self-deprecation, beybeh.

SOME DJ

Naalala ko rin yung isang DZUP DJ dati.

“That was <name of the field reporter>, live from the University Avenue where the Lantern Parade is currently happening right now at this very moment…”

Oo na. Ngayon na! Ngayon, ngayon! Currently! Right now! Live! How redundant can you get?

KEN

“Uy, what’s playing?” I asked my friend Ken habang nakikinig sa mp3 player.

“Running Through My Head,” he answered. “I forgot the duo’s name.”

“Ha? Ano yun?” Confused, I grabbed his left earphone and listened.

It was T.A.T.U. The song was All the Things She Said.

ACE

Habang pinakikinggan namin ang lyrics ng kanta ng Code Red na This is Our Song: You’re so beautiful, divine. Everything ’bout you is so fine.

Hirit ni Ace: “Alam nyo, akala ko talaga nung bata ako, tao si Divine.”

…

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