2013: The Year of the Fix

My housemates were weirded out by how different I sounded after coming back from a 2-week holiday stay at my parents house in Batangas, and shocked by the ugly metal wires that fenced my teeth. So I got myself braces to correct the alignment of my teeth. It’s not like my housemates didn’t know about it; I had been very vocal about how I wanted to do this. I guess they just didn’t realize I was dead serious about it. These braces are giving my teeth an excruciating embrace and making me harbor an emotion that never in my life I thought I would feel towards mealtime — dread.

Let’s em-brace changes this year. Right, Katy?

But if things go as planned, these braces are just a foreshadowing of what I am set to do for the rest of the year. You see, 2013 to me is the Year of the Fix. Why the Fix? Because this is the year I will correct what needs to be corrected, improve what needs to be improved, and remove what needs to be removed. Why a lousy name for year? I don’t know. I’m lousy, I guess. Maybe that needs to be fixed, too.

Earlier today, I just underwent a spot test for Fractional Laser Skin Resurfacing, a treatment to lighten the scars that I got from extended years of acne-infested adolescence. I had always been eyeing this procedure but it took so long because my doctor and I needed to get rid of the persistent pimples first and make sure that the treatment won’t do more harm. I’m a keloid-former and it makes the condition much more complicated than usual. But that’s another story.

But the “fixes” I’m referring to are not just those done in the name of vanity. It’s about health. I’m looking forward to the betterment of my physical, emotional, psychological, even financial health. This year, these goals will be my priorities:

1. Start jogging again. My weight gain has been bothering me (and other people). It’s time to do something about it. Thanks to my braces, I don’t think I have that high a tolerance for pain to endure overeating.
2. Consult with my doctor regularly. Early last year, septated cysts were discovered in my kidney accidentally. For weeks, I was scared but upon consultation with a kidney specialist, I was relieved to learn that they were not cancerous (not yet, at least). But we have to watch its growth and how it could be affecting the organ’s functions. I’m supposed to take blood and urine tests every few months and I’ll be diligent about it. I’m too happy to kick the bucket this early.
3. Talk to a therapist regularly. It’s high time that I do something about the issues I had been wrestling since I was a little boy. There are times when I remember and I am not comfortable talking about it to anyone and I just feel, I don’t know, sad. I need a go-to person that could give me some peace of mind when I need it.
4. Control my spending. Last year, I spent way too much on things I did not really need. I booked more flights than I actually flown, bought more clothes than I wore, and more things than I used. It’s time to stop and wisely manage my finances.
5. Lay out a clear career plan for myself. I love my job now and I will keep it. I just need to devise a way to make the most out my strengths that I could still do more. Maybe start a consulting firm? Or a travel agency? Something that would secure a brighter future for me while I am doing what I love doing.

I secretly called 2011 The Reach because it was the time that I just focused on doing what I needed to do regardless of how I felt about them and it paid off. With arms stretched to their limits, I was able to do something for my career and my family. The year after that was known to me as The Leap because it was the year that I dropped the things that were stable but made me unhappy, and take a leap of faith into doing what my heart was begging me to finally do. This is the Year of the Fix.

Silly as these so-called resolutions may sound to other people, they work for me. The past four years had been very kind to me and I am very grateful. Almost everything seemed to have gone as planned. It was as if things happened in my favor. But that’s the thing. Things did not just happen in my favor. I made them.

And I will again. Even with these ugly, torturous braces on.

Speak or the mumu behind you will speak for you.