yoshke.com

On May 31, 1985, tragedy struck when 41 tornadoes hit Canada and the US, leaving 76 people dead. At the same time, a doomed couple in the Philippines were having the best orgasms of their lives. Nine months (280 days) later, a cute, healthy baby boy was brought into this world by normal delivery. That was exactly a week before Microsoft had its initial public offering.

Today, Yoshke Dimen resides independently in Quezon City. He got a degree in Film from an overrated university in Diliman but is now desperately trying to pursue a career in Foreign Service. In 15 years’ time, he will become the youngest ambassador to the United Nations.

Yoshke is a very selfish and ambitious man who kills time by writing screenplays, watching football on TV, seeing all sorts of films, blogging, bloghopping, cooking, devouring what he cooked, and getting drunk. He amuses himself with idiotic thoughts by secretly observing other people’s behaviours.

Any ordinary guy his age would love the life he’s leading. But Yoshke is not an ordinary guy. He wants more.

Struggling Filmmaker. Although he works as a freelance screenwriter and a full-time web writer, he still wishes to produce the films that he will direct. He is a huge fan of French New Wave’s Francois Truffaut. He is madly in love with films. He makes sure he gets to watch at least four movies a week.

Future Diplomat. Since childhood, he has always dreamt of becoming a diplomat — be a herald of peace, be an agent of international cooperation, be an active player in improving the overall condition of humanity, and yeah, travel the world and get paid for it. His ultimate goal is to work for the United Nations, the organisation he strongly believes as the most effective in making this world a better place to live in.

Agnostic. He grew up in a very conservative society. His parents raised him as a very faithful Catholic. But he is not a Catholic anymore. Now, he doesn’t believe in religion. But he has a God. Well, sort of. Kinda. He’s not really sure.

Pyromaniac. Eversince he was a kid, he has always been fascinated with fire. In fact, it has been his icon. His friends remember his name upon the simple mention of fire. He has a third-degree burn on his left arm which he got when he was three, but it did not prevent him from playing with fire. Like fire, he’s playful yet serious, stubborn yet vulnerable, essential yet destructive, bright yet blinding, warm yet hostile, and of course, hot. (Kidding.)

Hopeless Romantic. He is in love with the very concept of love. To him, it is one of the most important things in this world. He believes that love knows no age, race or gender. Love can exist between people whatever the pairing is.

Gay. He used to love women. Period.

Even Steven. Equality is essential to him. Although he believes that nothing in this life is fair, he thinks that things can always be equal. Thus, he abhors racism. He spits on elitists. He tramples on narrow-minded people who believe that homosexuals and bisexuals are lower species. He hates prejudices and stereotypes.

Impatient. He values time so much. To him, it is something that should not be wasted because once lost, he can never have it back. Patience, to him, is not a virtue. It’s stupidity.

Fickle. He changes his mind like Jennifer Lopez changes her husband. Err… more like Madonna changes her image. No, like Mother Lily (local movie producer) changes the entire cast of her upcoming movie… Yeah, like Mother Lily. Eeew.

Indecisive. Indecisiveness is his greatest weakness. This is because he doesn’t like regretting about a lot of things. He makes sure he makes the wisest decisions and weighs every factor. But along the way, he gets confused and gets lost in thought.

Impulsive. Regarding things that don’t require much thinking, sometimes he doesn’t think at all. He walks around in a mall, finds something pretty, buys it right away, and realises it’s useless. He wakes up, decides he wants to go somewhere, takes the bus to that place, and realises it’s useless. He meets a person, finds him/her attractive, kiss him/her after an hour, and realises he/she is useless. (Don’t believe this part. Haha.)

Environmentalist. He respects nature as much as he respects himself.

Hematophobic / Hemaphobic. He is abnormally afraid of blood — human blood, in particular. He dreads the sight of blood. Even his own. Especially his own.

Travel Freak. He is a well-travelled person who appreciates every culture and people. But he has only seen the different parts of his own country. He wishes to go beyond the Philippine borders soon.

Coffee Addict. Brewed, decaf, or instant coffee — he doesn’t care. As long as it’s coffee, it’s fine with him.

Sports Enthusiast. He loves playing lawn tennis, table tennis, bowling, billiards, and football (soccer). He is a big True Blue (Chelsea), Liverpool, and Bayern Munich fan. He admires Miroslav Klose, Zenedine Zidane, Steven Gerrard, Oliver Kahn, Jens Lehmann, and David Villa (football); Timo Boll (table tennis); Roger Federrer and Marat Safin (lawn tennis); and Paeng Nepomuceno (bowling). His favourite national football teams are (in order) Germany, Spain, and England. He cried when Germany lost to Italy in the recent World Cup.

E-mail: dimen@yoshke.com
YM: fire_yoshke

Special thanks to Jhul Gutierrez for the artwork.