Finally An Update

Wuhooooo! After a seems-like-forever hiatus, I’m back, blogging.

The hell week is finally over.

I filed a week-long leave of absence for the Foreign Service Oral Examinations. It was tough, intense, and mind-blowing. Very. Waaaaah, I really hope I could make it.

One of the questions they asked me was, “Who’s your favorite Hollywood director?”

And I just stared at them for 10 seconds. I was beyond nervous. I didn’t know what to say. I don’t even have a fave Hollywood director. Wong Kar Wai and Francois Truffaut, yes, but they’re so not Hollywood.

The first name that came to my mind was David Fincher but I was worried they would think my choice was too violent. And then Steven Spielberg, and I thought they would think I was too juvenile.

And so I said, “Stephen Daldry.”

Poor me. Can’t even think of a much more famous director. But come to think of it, he really is my favorite right now. “The Hours” remains my all-time fave film, after all. And I really liked “The Reader.”

Another question they asked me: “Brilliante Mendoza has just won Best Director at Cannes Film Festival for his film about a young cop who raped and killed a woman and chopped her to pieces. What can you say about this?”

My answer? Hmm… I think I’ll just keep it to myself. Ehehe. My opinion is not very pretty.

…

Of course, days before the Exams, I was brushing up on my International Affairs. Was at Gloria Jeans Coffee in Tomas Morato/Timog a number of times. (Free Wi-Fi!)

On Monday, we saw Kim Chiu and Gerald Anderson. Yum Yum. Haha.

…

Last Tuesday, we finally found a new home! So later this month, my friends and I will be moving to GA Tower along EDSA, a stone’s throw from my workplace.

…

Yesterday was our Barrio Fiesta in Lemery, Batangas. Perfect, perfect. After a gruelling, almost suicide-inducing Foreign Service Exams, it was time to PIG OUT!

I love fiestas. Basically because I love to eat.

Kudos to the Spaniards for injecting the fiesta tradition to our culture. Ahahaha.

…

So right now, I’m back in the violently jolting metropolis. Work’s piled up. So I gotta split now.

Office Distractions

ACCUSING DISTRACTION

Tuesday morning. Esan, a brand new co-worker, excitedly told me about someone she used to work with.

Esan: Yoshke! I’d introduce someone to you! You’ll like him. He’s hot  and a real gentleman! His name is ^&%##.
Yoshke: Esan, I’m already seeing someone. I’m a one-man man. I’m one loyal, trustworthy guy.
Esan: Wushooo…
Yoshke: Ano namang tingin mo saken? MALANDI?
Everyone in the office, who, apparently, was listening: OO!

Hala. Sabay-sabay pa.

Singit pa nung isa, “At feeling mo HINDE?” Haha.

Henaku. Hindi naman talaga…

REPEATING DISTRACTION

One boring afternoon at the office.

Yoshke: If I tell you that I can sketch and paint, will you believe me?
Emcy: Yeah.
Yoshke: Eeeeeh. You shouldn’t have said “yes.” I wanted you to say “no.” Then I’d tell you “Yes, I can!”
Emcy: Hahaha.
Yoshke: Hmmm. I hate you! It didn’t go the way I wanted it to. So we’re gonna do it again!
Emcy: Haha. Okay.
Yoshke: Emcy, If I tell you that I can sketch and paint, will you believe me?
Emcy: No.
Yoshke: Yes, I can!

Parang tanga lang kami.

CONFUSING DISTRACTION

Yoshke: Emcy, pabili naman ako ng cupped noodles (or cup noodles?). Nissin ha, Nissin. Seafood flavor. Nissin ha! NISSIN!
Emcy: Ah sige, anong noodles? Lucky Me Supreme?

Anong mahirap intindihin sa sinabi ko. Sabihin nyo saken. Anooo?!?!?!

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Top 10 Ways to Ask for a Raise or Promotion

As one RD quote goes, “the moment you settle for less than you deserve, you’ll get even less than you settle for.” It maybe very painful to hear but this is true.

Salary is the primary reason we work our butts off all day. But not all jobs pay well. And even if our present employer gives us what the law requires and the conventions suggest, we still find ourselves struggling to make do with what we receive. If you feel that you have proven yourself as an efficient, competent and productive employee over time but you still find yourself awfully broke when the month ends, maybe it’s time to ask for a raise or a promotion or both. Here are the top ten creative ways to do that.

10. Second the motion. All the time.

Although having your own stand on the company’s many issues will show your character and wit, being the “second voice” has its own perks, too. Let your boss know that you are on his side all the time by acting like an echo.

Starting today, practise saying “I agree completely” or “I agree absolutely.” You can change the last word with another positive adverb as long as the first two words are “I agree.” Call it blind loyalty but you need a raise. The last thing you want is to play on a different team against your boss.

What is more effective? Eavesdrop on his conversations and then feed him back the ideas you heard as if they were yours. He would think you are of the same wavelength and that you know him too well you could even read his mind.

9. Park your car beside his.

You may think that this is ridiculous but parking your car beside your boss’s has a lot of advantages. Stationing yourself before and after office hours in the parking lot can help you ask for a raise. You may not realise it but if you’re the first and last person he sees every single day, you will seep into his subconscious. The next time he wants to promote someone, at least you have parked your memory somewhere in his mind.

8. Pull off an 007.

Yes, Bond, James Bond. Spywork is not really new to many workplaces. The truth is, some of your co-workers may be spying on you, trying to copy your work and make it look like their own. You can do the same but in this case, we’ll play evil.

Don’t spy for yourself. Rather, spy for your boss. Report everything that is going on in the department. The next time you hear your officemate say nasty things about your boss, prepare a tape recorder and let your boss hear it. It’s not like you’re being an office snitch. You just want to be honest and fair to the person you work for. You’ll get extra points for doing what is expected of you. Who knows? A raise, if not a promotion, might follow soon.

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Allow Me to Be Emo

And just like that, it all comes crashing down. And my one dream is shattered. As shattered as I am now.

If you wanna be friends with me, I’m telling you, now is the best time.

I’m OK now. You see, I move on easily. Haha. Over it.

Define Euphoria

National List of Passers
2007 FOREIGN SERVICE OFFICER WRITTEN EXAMINATIONS
Held 19-21 December 2007 (Released: 29 August 2008)
Department of Foreign Affairs – Philippines

Gaaawd. Just when I start envying my friends (especially Bebs) for reaching new heights in their careers, something like this comes my way.

From a thousand examinees, now we’re down to 58. (Yeah, the mortality rate in FSO Exam makes us all go suicidal.) I didn’t expect this. I absolutely hoped for it but not expected. I mean, come on, the questions were like:

• Formulate an ECONOMIC policy for the Philippine Embassy in Paris and back it up with a theoretical framework. (I didn’t have any Economics classes in college, thank you very much.)
• Trace the history of the Middle East from the Mesopotamian Era up to the present. (What?! Are you frakkin’ serious? I’m a FILM graduate!)

And there were almost 30 questions. Maybe what they needed was a thesis dissertation prepared within half a day. It was the craziest three days of my life. And knowing I failed to follow some test instructions, I really did not expect anything. In fact, I ALMOST GAVE UP ON IT.

Now, there’s just one more round left. Another 3-day exam. Just one more. I’m gonna need a tuxedo. Haha.

Dahil dyan, magpapa-cheeseburger ako! Burger! Burger!

I am sooo gonna become a diplomat.

London

Exactly a month ago, I was staying at my brother’s room, watching Pushing Daisies (oh, Lee Pace is just sooo cute I wanna be dead and be touched by him), when my mother came in and said she wanted to talk. Something that never fails to send me to utter discomfort.

Mum: You told your Tita Esther you wanted to study in London?

Tita Esther is my mum’s friend who has just arrived from London. She visited last week and we kinda had a little chat and I kinda told her how much I wanted to study abroad.

Yoshke: Uhm, Er, I might have told her. Yuh.
Mum: You really want to?
Yoshke: Uhm, yeah, a bit.
Mum: Well, you may. I’m letting you.

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Freezing Point

Status: Leavin’.
Music: How Far We’ve Come – Matchbox Twenty | This is the Last Time – Keane

I feel cold. I mean that literally. Right now, the cold wind from the air-conditioner is blowing towards my cube as always. Not to mention that I walked from C5 corner Ortigas Avenue, where my sister had dropped me off, to the office (Pearl Drive/San Mig Avenue) early in the morning. Oh yeah, someone was so stupid he walked for 30 minutes in the rain. I don’t know what spirit possessed my body that made me do that but I enjoyed it immensely. Currently, I’m wearing a sweater and I am still shaking. Wuuu.

This is the coldest day since I started working here. Interestingly, today is my last day here. Yep, it’s final. There have been several attempts but this time, I’m really quitting. I already sent my resignation letter two weeks ago. I can’t really explain how I feel right now. A part of me is relieved because I’ve wanted to leave since, er, my second month here. A part of me is sad because, hey, I made a lot of friends here. At the end of the day, it still boils down to money. Would love to have a lot of friends and a lot of money at the same time but the terrible pay here makes it impossible to use the words “happy” and “salary” in one sentence. Oops, I think I just did.

This resignation is also one of my desperate attempts to start a new life. I have no idea why I have been saying “new life” over and over again recently. It’s not as if I’m a drug user or a prostitute and I need to put the past behind. Maybe it’s because I think my life is in disarray now that I need to reassess myself. I need time to reflect and rearrange my cluttered life. Quitting is always difficult. Starting anew is always difficult. But heck, I gotta start somewhere. This is somewhere.

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Falsity*

Now that you know the basic rules of logic, time to answer this question:

Which of the following is false?

A. The sky is falling.
B. The wolf is coming.
C. The team is expanding.

Easy, yes? It’s soooo Kindergarten.
*This post is an office chuchu. If you don’t get what it means, you probably won’t.

A Big Head’s Blatherskite

Status: God himself could not contain us.
Music: One Last Song – Josiah Leming

I was just browsing through my files and I couldn’t help but snicker at the articles I had written in the past months: medical packaging, bungee cargo nets, pimp canes, folding cutting tables and oh, get this, industrial vinyl extrusions.

Five months ago, I started working as a web writer for my current employer. Although the company is despicable in all sense of the word, I am proud to say that our team’s client is anything but. To be honest, never has the thought of staying here this long entered my mind. But yeah, I’ve been here for five months and I seem to be counting some more.

I remember posting this on my third day at work:

My friends have been asking me how I find my new job as a writer. They ask me if it’s fulfilling. And of course, I have a default answer. “I don’t need a fulfilling job right now. The only job that will give me fulfillment is being a diplomat. And until I become one, I don’t need to feel fulfilled. I just need to feel happy.”

Surprisingly, right now, I feel both happy and fulfilled. The job turned out to be the best training that any type of writer could ever get. On my first day here, I was required to write about romantic love. It was probably the easiest topic any writer as hopeless romantic as me could get. Then the next days brought me diverse topics ranging from GPS dog tracking to jock itch to hoist brakes. Who cares about hoist brakes? Exactly.

I even wrote about how cosy hotels and how fantastic restaurants in Omaha are. Oh yes, Omaha is a nice city. But it would’ve been nicer had I actually been there.

Some of the topics, I’d never even heard of before. Sometimes, resources were scarce; thus, I had to squeeze so much creative juice from the deepest recesses of my brain, which used to contain only a little perversions and a lot of arrogance.

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The Ghost Behind Debbie

Status: I’m not dense. I just had a slight lack of common sense…
Music: Go On Girl – Ne-Yo

Note: I know Halloween has long been over but I just really have to blog about this because this is the first time I experienced something like this since I started blogging in 2004.

I don’t really have a third eye or sixth sense or something. But I have had a few encounters with the supernatural since I was in Grade School. I don’t see them, though. I hear them. I feel them. I just know when there’s someone else (or something else) present in the same room I am in. But it doesn’t happen all the time. Here are some of my past encounters:

- When I was in High School, my friends were shocked to see two “me’s” in the same room. Yep, someone took my form and did a freak-fest with my friends. I never saw him.

- Back in college, I was in Manila when I received a call from a cousin who was staying at our house in Batangas. She told me that she was currently looking at someone who looked exactly like me. That someone was standing at the doorway of our house.

- I was staying at my friend’s house when a heavy invisible force struck me. There was a part of their house that I couldn’t lay my eyes on. It was painful to the eyes and it really felt heavy. I can’t describe it properly. Another friend noticed how I was acting that night. She said, “You see him? I can. It’s an old man.” Later, we found out that it was where my friend’s lolo died.

As I said, since I started blogging in 2004, I haven’t had any contact with them. Until I got this job.

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