A Break-up Letter


I never expected I'd be writing you this letter. We've had six years of wonderful memories but I'm afraid it had come to the Read more

Welcome to the New Yoshke.com


New look. New attitude. New experiences. Honestly, I had been neglecting this blog the past few weeks because of my awfully hectic schedule. Work had Read more

Sometimes We Burn to Live


Whenever I meet people for the first time, it always happens. When they start their sentence with "I hope you don't mind me asking but," Read more

Judging By the Cover


Our office is just a stone's throw from where I live. In fact, all I have to do is cross EDSA and voila, hello Read more

Fireworks, Hormones, and this Blog Post


You remember last week when I told you I found it difficult to blog since I met you? Since we became a couple officially, Read more

Do They Read Blogs in Heaven?


Whenever I say that the earliest memory I have is the accident wherein I had my left arm somewhat toasted, I lie. My earliest Read more

Unusual Breakfast


Here we are again. In the usual corner. Usual table. Usual diner. Usual time. And most probably, usual meal. I'm getting tired of this Read more

Top 10 National Stereotypes


Heaven is where the cooks are French, the police are British, the mechanics are German, the lovers are Italian and everything is organized by Read more

EDSA


It could have been a horrible Saturday. I was in the passenger seat. It was a bit raining. Normally, EDSA gets on my nerves. That's why Read more

Why Nursery Rhymes Are So Violent


A few months ago, I was teaching my 4-year old nephew some nursery rhymes with a DVD. After a lot of singing, he slowly Read more

Top 10 Worst Things to Say During Sex


Sex is the art of love. It must be done in the most enjoyable and most satisfying manner. This act of love of two Read more

The Promil Kid Drops the Bomb


Of all the living things created by God, I love my nephew the most. I call him the Promil Kid. He’s the cutest thing. Read more

Friends

Chestit Rojden Den, Plamen!

Posted on by Yoshke in Emo, Friends, Personal Life |

What’s in Bulgaria that is well worth a visit?” I asked a friend when he suggested that I visit Bulgaria after telling him that my ultimate dream was to tour Europe.

For the longest time, Bulgaria had no significance in my life. Back then this East European state was just another country to me. I knew that its capital is Sofia. I could correctly identify it on the map. But that was all. When I said I wanted to visit Europe, I meant Germany, France, Britain, Spain, Italy. Not Bulgaria.

But something happened.

Six years ago, I hit rock bottom. Weeks before my college graduation, family problems and friendship issues had all caved in on me and I did not intend to get out of the rubbles. We’ve been to that place, the rock bottom. This hard, dark place might look and feel different to each of us but our reaction is always the same regardless — seek help. Hitting record lows emotionally is bad enough. But it is not “being there” per se that kills; it is the realization that no friend is there to lend a hand.

Every morning, waking up was such a chore. At night, though I was more alive, I felt like a zombie. It was during this time when I always found myself alone in more ways than one. I would sit there, try to blog something, and log into my web accounts. I would just stare at my friends list, wonder which of them would understand me, and find no one. That was the point when I just cried for help. Luckily for me, someone answered.

In 2006, I met someone online by accident. Online friends were not new to me. As a blogger, I develop friendships with other bloggers even before I meet them. But this online friend was not a blogger and he was not from here. At the time, he lived at a provincial town in a humble country in Europe. I don’t remember how we got virtually close but there was something about him that I found welcoming and comfortable. He spoke good English. He was very goodlooking. He made me laugh every time we talked. Although he lived on the other side of the planet, he was my constant companion.

I was not the kind of person who would find refuge in a stranger. But I needed someone to talk to — no matter how physically distant, no matter how virtual. Many times I had considered myself pathetic or desperate for having a friend that I had not even met personally. But eventually I realized there was nothing wrong with being able to share bits of my life with him. After all, I needed to get up and get out of that dark place.

Single-handedly, he pulled me out of it.

Read more

Viewed 5458 times by 1703 visitors this month

16 Comments

She Who Shines

Posted on by Yoshke in Conversations, Emo, Friends, Personal Life |

She came walking slowly towards me, sat beside me and introduced herself, “Hi! I’m Astrid.” Her name means “star.”

“I’m Yoshke,” I replied. Reluctantly, I shook her hand. “Nice to meet you.” The whole thing was totally weird to me.

It was the moment when, I think, she and I truly became friends. I wouldn’t say we became inseparable since then but I missed her every time we were apart. From then on, we became distant companions. Although we lived miles away, I knew I could rely on her any damn time. She would text me whenever she was around and she would always invite me to an afternoon of enjoying street food. Or just a day of doing nothing at all.

She’s like that every time. She appears whenever she feels like it and I can always expect her to constantly flicker in and out of my world. She’s like a friend from an alternate universe. She’s a flicker of joy. Every moment with her is short, is sweet, is a recurring dream, something I always look forward to and enjoy when it finally comes. She’s the twinkle every dreamer, who has been endlessly watching a certain star, waits patiently for.

She and I seldom get in touch but I always make a point she’s one of the first to know whenever I experience a sudden surge of emotions — when I’m down, when I’m extremely happy. And even when nothing happens, I send her a random, sometimes almost empty, message just to let her know a dreamer is thinking of a star.

One time in Puerto Princesa City, on the way to Crocodile Park, we were in a trike and sat silently next to each other. “I love this,” she uttered. “Do you remember this one scene in Pulp Fiction?”

“Which scene?” I asked, intrigued.

Read more

Viewed 6506 times by 1798 visitors this month

17 Comments

The Natural Phenomenon of Madness

Posted on by Yoshke in Friends, Movies |

I remember back in college I was a Cinemalaya Independent Film Festival volunteer. I was part of the group of volunteers who organized the many events and gatherings leading to the launch of the film fest as an usher, editor, and more. After graduation, I had been completely out of the film loop as I turned into a corporate slave. Sad to say that the last time I saw a Cinemalaya film was when I was still a volunteer. I had not seen that many independent films since then. Shame on me, indeed.

I guess much of the reason I had not seen any indie film in a while was because I felt frustrated. After all, I loved filmmaking but it had been years since the last time I was a part of it.

This time is different, though. This year, I am going to see Cinemalaya films with a brand new attitude. I am ecstatic that many of my friends back in college are now part of Cinemalaya not as volunteers but as participants, as filmmakers. That makes Cinemalaya this year a lot more exciting for me.

One of the films participating in this year’s NETPAC is The Natural Phenomenon of Madness, directed by my Parmesan friend Charliebebs Gohetia, or simply Bebs. (Check out the reason why I call him Parmesan friend here.) And of course, I shall be watching his film FIRST. The Natural Phenomenon of Madness tells a story that is not just interesting but completely mind-blowing.

Two years after she was raped, a woman agrees to meet with her rapist in the beautiful ruins of Intramuros. As they have the same blood type, her rapist asks her to donate blood for his operation claiming this will lengthen his life and will give him ample time to seek redemption. The woman refuses to do so as she rediscovers she is still a victim of unrequited love towards her rapist.

Told in two separate perspectives, the story revolves around how the woman and man pick the pieces of their broken lives after the rape, meeting every so often at places that remind them of their past. They are confronted by the fact that they are both victims of each other: THE WOMAN struggles with loving no one but the man; THE MAN, struggles with his guilt knowing he can’t love the woman the way she wants him to.

If you’re going to watch Cinemalaya films, please support this film and put it on your list. Here’s the screening schedule of this film: July 21 CCP Little Theater 9pm & July 23 Greenbelt 3, Cinema 5 9pm

The Natural Phenomenon of Madness stars Jess Mendoza, Opaline Santos, Ces Aldaba, Regina Valenzuela, Patrick Esteban, Kimmy Buquia, Anthony Sarabia Torres, Xian Khou, Rjames Villaran. Directed by the one, the only (char) Charliebebs Gohetia!

 

Viewed 3324 times by 1018 visitors this month

7 Comments

Akala Mo Lang Wala Nang SLUMBOOK, Pero Meron, Meron, MERON!

Posted on by Yoshke in Friends, Humor |

Once upon a time, I had a witty friend who had a witty idea. Her name was Tonet. “Yoshke, I have a brilliant concept for a business,” Tonet exclaimed.

“Ano na namang kagagahan ‘yan?” I asked, knowing her history of kagagahan.

“Let’s create a witty planner that will rival that of Starbucks,” my witty friend explained. “We will sell copies of it. It will be epic!”

“Haynaku friend, I’m so busy with my full-time job. I don’t know where to find time to create a witty planner with you,” said I, who was trying to prove my buzzkill reputation right.

We parted ways and she never brought it up again.

Months had passed when I received a message from her, asking me to blog about the planner she published with a new partner. “Wow, you pushed through with it. Congrats! Send me photos of its pages and if I found them hilarious, I’d blog about it.”

It was hilarious. I blogged about it. Others blogged about it. Needless to say, with the content of the planner, there was no way it would flop. Mainstream media picked it up while a cult following was brewing underground. Soon, my witty friends who created the planner called themselves Witty Will Save the World. I was so proud of them.

After the “I was supposed to get that Coffeehouse Planner but I got fat and broke on my 10th frappe” 2010 Planner, they released these two:

And now, after the success of their first slumbook, they are reprinting the “Akala Mo Lang Wala Nang Slumbook pero Meron Meron Meron” slumbook with added features. (When I say features, I mean kagagahan, haha.)

And in the spirit of friendship and fulfilling promises, I’m blogging about it. Oh, I take that back. The truth is, I’m promoting it not because of the friendship and the people behind it but because of the product. It is a real gem, a true treasure, a genuine jewel, and I’m running out of synonyms. It is epic. No, it is E-fawking-P-I-C.

So what is in the slumbook? Well, it has everything you expect in a slumbook and everything you don’t expect in a slumbook. You think I’m confusing you? I won’t do that! I love you coz you’re reading this blog. But I’ll just stop blabbing and let these photos do the talking.

Read more

Viewed 3361 times by 1016 visitors this month

39 Comments

College Friends Bring On the Crazy!

Posted on by Yoshke in Conversations, Friends, Humor |

I clearly remember how my friend Dohna attempted to start singing Tina Arena’s Burn with “Do you wanna be a fo…” and tried to get away with it by claiming she was about to say “forest,” not “foet.” And how she shared some words of wisdom, telling me that “sometimes we have to eat our friends in order to live and because they eat us too.

Well, Dohna is a college friend. And she’s not alone. There are a lot of people like her where she came from. Many of my college friends are hilariously epic.

College friends at Anawangin Cove

Meet Icang

Icang is your girl-next-door type, who just seems lost sometimes. Oh, make that most of the time. She’s the type who reacts to what my other friends and I are talking about just when we have completely moved on to the next topic. She’s adorable like that. No, really, she’s one of my favorite people in the world.

It had been years since I last saw her when we met at Greenbelt last week. I was still single when we last had a conversation and she had a boyfriend then. When we met again, we switched shoes. She was now single and I, happily committed. I was so excited to tell her how happy I was with my current relationship. “We’ve been together for over 2 years,” I said proudly as if saying there’s no way we would break up! “Two years, Icang, 2 years!”

She tapped my shoulder, smiled, gave me a look that I did not know what to make out of, and said “Good for you.” In my head, I was like What the eff was that?

Read more

Viewed 2276 times by 762 visitors this month

13 Comments

Farewell, Friendster

Posted on by Yoshke in Emo, Friends, University, Vanities, Web |

I’m so tempted to ask Friendster “What took you so long?”

Friendster has become irrelevant for many people and many of us expected it was only a matter of time before they announce to wipe out user content posted on their site.

Well, the day has come.

A part of me is mourning. Although I have not logged into my Friendster account since, like, forever, I still like the idea of having my profile out there for my old friends to see. I can say that Friendster was the first full-blown social networking site that I joined. I was a college sophomore then, the latter months of 2003.

Looking at my Friendster profile, I realized just how much I had changed. My Friendster profile is like a portrait of the old me, with testimonials reinforcing that image. It contains my previous dream of becoming a diplomat, my past ambition to become a filmmaker, and my obsession with fire. (Of course, it wasn’t an exactly accurate portrait. Coz if it were, I would’ve found the words ass, bitch, damn you, pathetic loser, wuss, lunatic all over my testimonials section. LOL.)

Speaking of testimonials, I’m saving the ego-boosting vanity posts (aka testimonials) here on my blog.  And my reaction today as I backread. And just a heads up, every time you see the words kind, mabait, cool, note that it’s sarcastic. Hahaha.

Read more

Viewed 2192 times by 670 visitors this month

10 Comments

How the 13th Zodiac Sign Rattled the World

Posted on by Yoshke in Friends, Humor, Public Affairs, Science, Web |

Yesterday morning, I logged in to my Facebook account only to find almost everyone in panic. Apparently, their zodiac signs have changed and they refuse their new sign. What’s worse, there’s a 13th sign — Ophiuchus, the serpent-bearer, the culprit, the cause of the global disorder. Haha.

image courtesy of astrology.com

Here are some zodiac-related status messages that I gathered yesterday (including mine):

Winston: hindi ko alam pano mabuhay bilang Cancer. :(

Andre: MY LIFE IS A LIE! MY LIFE IS A LIE! MY LIFE IS A LIE!

Yoshke: Kebs na ako sa bagong zodiac. Basta ako, PISCES ako. Malansa ako eh.

Yoshke: Dear Zenaida Seva, I dare you! Say “Ophiuchus” 5 times non-stop.

Dohna: So I’m a Gemini now. I guess that explains the bipolar tendencies. Zenaida Seva may Ophiuchus na. Award.

Gail: Ophiu-something ka rin, Yoshke? :D pakshet ako naging Virgo. Soooooooooo nooooooooootttttt bagay!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Jerwin: I hate it. I’m no longer LEO? Ayaw ko ng Cancer! Argh. Damn Earth Rotation changes!

Leo: if we are to include the 13th Zodiac into the equation, i’m now officially Leo…

Jayvee: i’m not sexy anymore. =(

So what really happened?

Read more

Viewed 2473 times by 725 visitors this month

36 Comments

The Other Promil Kids

Posted on by Yoshke in Conversations, Family, Friends, Humor |

I have been receiving a lot of emails about the Promil Kid from my readers. If only my nephew could blog, I think he would create his own (which is just right since he has been outshining me here on MY OWN blog, LOL). Or, when he reaches the right age, he’ll ask for his share of whatever I earn from this blog (which he will never get).

Anyway, whenever my friends and I meet, they always ask how my nephew is doing or whether there will be any Promil Kid posts anytime soon. See, he’s stealing my friends, too! That kid is evil! And the worst part is, he doesn’t know it!

Most of the time, my friends would also tell me stories about the little children in their lives. You see, most of us know a Promil Kid. It may not be my nephew but I’m sure you know a smart, know-a-hell-of-a-lot kid. And I never get tired of listening to stories about clever, cute and sometimes rude toddlers! Here are some of them.

PROMIL KIDS ARE VISUAL AND BLUNT.

Mind you, visual + blunt isn’t really a pleasant combination. Take my friend Dane’s little sister for example. A couple of years ago, at the start of classes, her mother came to class only to find out that the little girl was not there. Panicking, she looked for her all over the area and found her in another Kindergarten class. Asked why she was there, the evil kid answered, “Eh kasi yung katabi ko, tulo yung uhog! Kadiri!”

She was brought back to her original class.

The next day, the exact same thing happened. She was missing and they found her  in the other class. My friend’s mother said, “Di ba sabi ko sa’yo, dun ka sa kabilang room? Bakit andito ka?”

The girl responded, “Eh kasi yung teacher ko AMPANGET!!!”

PROMIL KIDS ARE REALISTIC!

Don’t ever mess up their reality! One day, the little sister of one of my friends was having a Science exam. The teacher specifically instructed the children to color living things brown and non-living things yellow.

This Promil Kid went home with one mistake, something that she could not accept. She was pissed.

When her mother checked where she went wrong, she realized that the girl colored the grass green and not brown.

“Bakit mo kinulayan na green? Sabi sa directions, pag living things, kulayan ng brown!”

The kid answered, “Eh sa kulay green yung grass ko eh! Pinipilit nyo ko na kulayan ng brown eh kulay green naman talaga yung grass!”

Read more

Viewed 1894 times by 601 visitors this month

28 Comments

Dump Your Guy, Date Andre

Posted on by Yoshke in Conversations, Friends, Humor |

The last time I featured Andre and his crazy antics on this blog was in December last year when I posted about Pasay City. A lot has changed since then. For starters, we are now working with the same company. And we’re not just officemates, we’re also in the same team. We’re also housemates. So you can just imagine how many doses of major major “crazy” I get from him every day.

Well, Andre is single. Very much so. And if you’re looking for a witty, brilliant, vibrant young guy who can brighten up your day with just a few words, Andre is for you. (OMG I sound like a pimp.) But hey, seriously, he’s a catch. And if you’re looking, drop a comment because he is looking, too. He has been looking. For a long time. Very long time. Very, very long time. Please guys, somebody just take him! It’s such a looong time already. LOL.

And much like the Promil Kid, Andre is actually a most-requested on this blog. So here’s a piece of him. Reasons why Andre is the perfect guy for you. Take it, take it. (Batteries Sold Separately.)

ANDRE IS CHARITABLE.

Andre and I were walking  to our apartment building when we spotted this goodlooking guy having lunch at a carinderia near our place. He squeezed my arm. (That’s a sign of Andre having a chuvachoo-choo moment. Not that chuvachoo-choo means love; it could be just libog for all we know.)

Andre: OMG, Yoshke. Look over there.
Yoshke: Yeah, he’s cute.
Andre: Eeeeeh.
Yoshke: But he’s kinda not your market. You know, social class-wise.
Andre: True. Pero di ba? Siya yung tipong OK lang saken. OK lang saken na gamitin nya ako. Parang gusto ko syang iahon sa kahirapan. Syeeet. Bibigyan ko sya ng pangkabuhayan showcase a la Wowowee!

ANDRE IS ALWAYS LOOKING FOR OPPORTUNITIES

Shy Guy, Andre and I were having dinner when Shy Guy mentioned that from his office, they could see Jake Cuenca’s jaw dropping I-want-to-be-a-pair-of-briefs-someday billboard for Bench Uncut.

Shy Guy: Andre, di ba gusto mo si Jake Cuenca?
Andre: Haynaku, tinatanong pa ba yun?
Yoshke: Honga, eh di ba iniiyakan nya si Jake Cuenca.
Shy Guy: Matutuwa ka sa office namin. Mula sa cafeteria namin, kita namin yung billboard ni Jake Cuenca.
Andre: OMG OMG OMG! May job opening ba sa inyo? Kahit anong trabaho.
Yoshke: Haha, I thought you’re very happy with your job.
Andre: Eeeh, with Jake there, I could be happier!

Read more

Viewed 1798 times by 573 visitors this month

33 Comments

Who Ate the Tiramisu?

Posted on by Yoshke in Conversations, Friends, Humor, Mysteries, University |

I don’t think I’ll ever forget this story.

When we were in senior year, my college friends and I just loved staying at my friend Ayn’s place. The house is along Banawe St. in Quezon City and it was our favorite place to just chill-out, study, work on our group projects, shoot films, and just kill time. We always went there in a group.

image courtesy of Lis Parsons of www.dailymail.co.uk

Why that place? Because it’s so big with seven rooms, far from buzzkill neighbors, the design is ideal for parties, and the best of all, NO PARENTS. Ayn lives with only her sister, who is the type who asks you, “Hey, when is your next party here? I have some spare beer in the fridge.” That’s the kind of sister you wanna have.

Anyway, one time, Ayn was telling us the WHOLE DAY about the cake she had at home. Being someone who is allergic to anything (or anyone) sweet, Ayn offered, “Guys, we have tiramisu at home. You might want to come over and have some. It’s just me and the maid at home these days and we can’t possibly devour it all.

As much as we’d love to make love with her tiramisu, her house was just too far from the university. It’s a nice place to party but you won’t really drive or commute all the way to that other end of the city just to have cake, when there’s a  bakeshop in Philcoa. Besides, it was thesis season. Everyone was a worker bee.

So no one really went over to Ayn’s place and touched that tiramisu. Poor cake.

A week passed and while all of us were killing time, thinking of something to do, somebody teased Ayn that maybe she had another tiramisu cake that she would love to share since we were not busy anymore.

Funny you mentioned it,” Ayn said. “It was just so weird. A few days ago, I was gonna have tiramisu so I opened the ref but was shocked to find there was none of it left. So I asked Ate Tessie. I asked her where the cake was. She said that one of my friends ate it.

Read more

Viewed 1832 times by 625 visitors this month

9 Comments

1 2 3 4 5 6 7   Next »