A Break-up Letter


I never expected I'd be writing you this letter. We've had six years of wonderful memories but I'm afraid it had come to the Read more

Welcome to the New Yoshke.com


New look. New attitude. New experiences. Honestly, I had been neglecting this blog the past few weeks because of my awfully hectic schedule. Work had Read more

Sometimes We Burn to Live


Whenever I meet people for the first time, it always happens. When they start their sentence with "I hope you don't mind me asking but," Read more

Judging By the Cover


Our office is just a stone's throw from where I live. In fact, all I have to do is cross EDSA and voila, hello Read more

Fireworks, Hormones, and this Blog Post


You remember last week when I told you I found it difficult to blog since I met you? Since we became a couple officially, Read more

Do They Read Blogs in Heaven?


Whenever I say that the earliest memory I have is the accident wherein I had my left arm somewhat toasted, I lie. My earliest Read more

Unusual Breakfast


Here we are again. In the usual corner. Usual table. Usual diner. Usual time. And most probably, usual meal. I'm getting tired of this Read more

Top 10 National Stereotypes


Heaven is where the cooks are French, the police are British, the mechanics are German, the lovers are Italian and everything is organized by Read more

EDSA


It could have been a horrible Saturday. I was in the passenger seat. It was a bit raining. Normally, EDSA gets on my nerves. That's why Read more

Why Nursery Rhymes Are So Violent


A few months ago, I was teaching my 4-year old nephew some nursery rhymes with a DVD. After a lot of singing, he slowly Read more

Top 10 Worst Things to Say During Sex


Sex is the art of love. It must be done in the most enjoyable and most satisfying manner. This act of love of two Read more

The Promil Kid Drops the Bomb


Of all the living things created by God, I love my nephew the most. I call him the Promil Kid. He’s the cutest thing. Read more

Love

Unusual Breakfast

Posted on by Yoshke in Flash Fiction, Love |

Here we are again. In the usual corner. Usual table. Usual diner. Usual time. And most probably, usual meal. I’m getting tired of this really. Everything’s a routine. And for what it’s worth, you’re the only same old thing that I’m not tired of. But I’m tired of this. Having the same food for breakfast before we go to work.

“What are we really?” I speak first.

You give me a puzzled look.

I speak again. “You said we’re friends. But the things we do — the things I do with you — the thing’s I’ve done FOR you — and the things I’m so willing to do. They are things I don’t usually do with or for my friends.”

You reach for the menu and browse through it like you’re not hearing a thing.

“And the things you’ve done. They are things no other friend has done for me…. Are we really friends? Is that all we have? Friendship?”

You refuse to talk. You just sit there.

Just friendship? That’s all we have?”

But I seem to be talking with myself. You give no decent reaction to the question I’ve long wanted to ask you. The question I think I’m wasting all my energy asking.

Disappointed, I release a deep sigh. You continue to pretend trying hard to decide what to have for breakfast when we both know you’ll be having the same old thing. You’re just avoiding the topic. So I just let go of it and try not to spoil this morning like it hasn’t been yet.

I change the topic. “You ready to order?”

“Sure. I’m starving.” Finally, your first words for today. It’s so clear how much you hate talking about that topic. Talking about us.

I call on the waitress, the one who’s always served us our meal. In fact, she knows our name and we chat when she’s not busy. We are regular customers. She approaches our table.

“What are you two having?” Her tone sounds like she never really has to ask for she knows exactly what food we are gonna order.

You put down the menu, look at the waitress, smile, then turn to me. And say, “Something more than friendship.”

(I swear I heard the waitress say “I know, ‘right.”)


Note: Blogger’s original work. This is fiction. Please see legal and ethical reminders on the sidebar. Thanks very much.

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How to Burn Bridges

Posted on by Yoshke in How To, Love |

Status: Hap-hap-happy.
Music: Broken Strings | James Morrison feat Nelly Furtado

Care to solve the following problems? Drop your two cents here.

Problem #1

You’ve had the best five months together. Suddenly, you get distracted. You become busy with other things. You’re still in love with her but time isn’t one of the things you can give her right now. Before you know it, it’s been weeks.

One day, finally, you decide to meet her and talk. She asks if you want to end the relationship. You say, “it’s up to you.” Pissed, she tells you “Aright, it’s over.” And being the prideful person that you are, you don’t wanna look like the one on the losing end, so you say, “Okie. No big deal.” And then you part ways.

The funny thing is, you are still in love with each other. MADLY. But you are both afraid to look like the one aching for it. Since then, you haven’t heard from each other. You’ve never been in love with anyone after her. She’s in a relationship now but she’s still deeply in love with you.

Three years later, you meet again. It’s the day you’ve both been waiting for. You ask her to leave her boyfriend for you. She does.

And because you’ve always loved each other, you are both in euphoria. But as the days pass, you realize that everything isn’t how it used to be and that you’ve been in love with her memory and not with who she is now. And now, you want to end it. How are you gonna tell her?

Problem #2

She’s always been in love with you and it’s no secret. Your family and friends are aware of it. In fact, they have been teasing you, pairing you up with her all the damn time. She’s pretty, kind, and very likable. She’s almost the perfect girlfriend.

But you’ve been having this identity crisis lately. It is starting to dawn on you that you are turning gay.

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Something Silly

Posted on by Yoshke in Blurts, Love |

Whenever my friends gave me a call in wee hours of the night, crying because they were madly missing their boyfriends or girlfriends, I secretly laughed at them. I just thought it was silly to weep just because they were not with the person they longed for. Sure, I missed people badly before. But not so badly it could push me to tears.

I thought they were exaggerating. And for that, I wanted to slap them. Really hard.

I’m not supposed to write this entry because it’s Sunday and I don’t usually post on a Sunday. But heck, I’ve done everything — EVERYTHING — for diversion. Nothing worked. Yesterday, I was missing someone terribly. I only stopped crying when I heard his voice on the phone.

The funny thing was that the last time we saw each other was just that morning. When I woke up in his arms.

I had woken to his smile many mornings before. But it was my first time to rouse first and watch him sleep. His arms, around me. His lips, on my forehead. His breath, fluxing with mine. It was the happiest morning of my life.

Silly, I know. Slap me.

PS. Sorry, the previous post was meant to be read only by Shy Guy.

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Protected: Everyone is Meant for Someone

Posted on by Yoshke in Blurts, Euphoria, Love |

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Top 10 Ways to Break Up

Posted on by Yoshke in How To, Humor, Lists, Love |

Note: I originally wrote this for crunkish.com, a superduper fun website that features top 10 whatever things. If you wanna check it out, knock yourself out.

People make mistakes. It’s part of human nature. Sometimes, we purchase something and realize that it is useless. We say words we never expected to come out of our mouths. We do things that we will eventually regret in the future. When it comes to choosing our partners, we make lots of mistakes, too.

Falling in love is one of the best things in life. It gives us a shot at happiness. It gives us a chance to grow. It gives us the feeling that we are not alone and that (illusion that) we will never be. It gives us the assurance that we are needed and loved. It gives value to our existence.

We know, of course, that not all good things last forever. Most of the time, it’s very difficult to admit that we chose the wrong person for us and that the relationship is going nowhere. Parting ways with someone you have been in love with or you thought you were so in love with can be much harder than starting a relationship.

Certain circumstances, however, leave us with no choice. Sometimes, we find ourselves being with the wrong person. Sometimes, we wake up only to realize that everything was a mistake. If this is the case, then you really have to cut your ties. Here are some ways of saying goodbye to the one you thought you could spend the rest of your life with. (Warning: Items 10-9 must not be taken seriously. Lol. Just trying to prove a point.)

10. “Every man changes. I’m a man.”

One study reveals that most men are afraid to break it off with their partners. Thus, since they can’t say it directly, they destroy the good and lovable image they made to turn their partners off. If you are one of these men, you may want to change voluntarily to drive your love away. Stop saying words that take her breath away. Stop showering. Stop making love with her. Stop being the man she loved, loves and would continue to love.

It doesn’t mean you have to turn bad. Well, basically, you really have to be bad but only for a time. Once the relationship is over, compose yourself again and find another woman. Yes, it’s not fair but is there anything fair in this world? That’s life. She has to live with it.

9. “If you can’t beat me at World of Warcraft, we can’t be together anymore.”

If you’re the playful and cunning type, then make her agree to a dare and have your relationship as a bet. That sounds silly but hey, you’re desperate. You really have to get rid of him/her or you’d rather play online games all your life. Any game will do. Whether it’s basketball or hangman, make sure it is something that you’re really good at. After you win, say this: “You know I love you babe, but rules are rules.”

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Office Distractions

Posted on by Yoshke in Career, Conversations, Friends, Humor, Love |

ACCUSING DISTRACTION

Tuesday morning. Esan, a brand new co-worker, excitedly told me about someone she used to work with.

Esan: Yoshke! I’d introduce someone to you! You’ll like him. He’s hot  and a real gentleman! His name is ^&%##.
Yoshke: Esan, I’m already seeing someone. I’m a one-man man. I’m one loyal, trustworthy guy.
Esan: Wushooo…
Yoshke: Ano namang tingin mo saken? MALANDI?
Everyone in the office, who, apparently, was listening: OO!

Hala. Sabay-sabay pa.

Singit pa nung isa, “At feeling mo HINDE?” Haha.

Henaku. Hindi naman talaga…

REPEATING DISTRACTION

One boring afternoon at the office.

Yoshke: If I tell you that I can sketch and paint, will you believe me?
Emcy: Yeah.
Yoshke: Eeeeeh. You shouldn’t have said “yes.” I wanted you to say “no.” Then I’d tell you “Yes, I can!”
Emcy: Hahaha.
Yoshke: Hmmm. I hate you! It didn’t go the way I wanted it to. So we’re gonna do it again!
Emcy: Haha. Okay.
Yoshke: Emcy, If I tell you that I can sketch and paint, will you believe me?
Emcy: No.
Yoshke: Yes, I can!

Parang tanga lang kami.

CONFUSING DISTRACTION

Yoshke: Emcy, pabili naman ako ng cupped noodles (or cup noodles?). Nissin ha, Nissin. Seafood flavor. Nissin ha! NISSIN!
Emcy: Ah sige, anong noodles? Lucky Me Supreme?

Anong mahirap intindihin sa sinabi ko. Sabihin nyo saken. Anooo?!?!?!

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“Julia/Juliana” Random Scene 1

Posted on by Yoshke in Flash Fiction, Love |

This is lifted from a screenplay I wrote with Tonet for a Hawaiian film. We were commissioned by a Filipino-American producer. It’s a romantic sci-fi musical tentatively titled “Julia/Juliana.” It is yet to be shot.

A little background. Michael is a white soldier. Juliana is his ex-wife who abandoned him. Julia is his new wife who looks, speaks, and acts almost exactly like Juliana. When Juliana decides to return and win back Michael’s heart, things get ugly. Julia leaves Michael and doesn’t want to be found. Anyway, this is just one scene.

82   EXT   BEACH,   NIGHT – LATER

At this time of the night with these crowds, it seems impossible to find JULIA. MICHAEL is acting desperately, asking anyone he comes across with.

JULIANA is doing the same.

MICHAEL breaks away from the crowd and approaches the shore. JULIANA comes running after him.

JULIANA:
Mike! Mike!

MICHAEL does not budge. He stops walking. JULIANA finally catches up.

JULIANA:
I’ve done everything but I really can’t find her.

MICHAEL:
That’s okay. Thank you.

JULIANA notices how this event saddens MICHAEL. For almost a minute, amidst the distant noise from the crowd, silence covers the shore.

JULIANA:
You really love her, don’t you?

MICHAEL just looks at JULIANA and smiles.

JULIANA:
I’m happy for you. But…

JULIANA seems to be very reluctant to complete her sentence.

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You Give Love a Bad Name

Posted on by Yoshke in Love, Whatnots |

Do you know what today is?

Yes, it’s Friday the Thirteenth. Boo.

But wait there’s more. Today, February 13, is Get a Different Name Day!

Sad fact of life: we did not choose our names. Our parents bestowed it upon us when we were born. If you like your name, well, freakin’ good for you.

But if your parents had such a bad taste at the time of your birth, you may have found yourself suffering from the consequences of having a terrible name all your life. (wuhuhuhu)

If you have long loathed your name, February 13 is for you. It is on this day that we are allowed to change our names. Choose a name of your liking and tell your family and friends about it. Take advantage of this day because this privilege lasts only for 24 hours.

If I were to change my name, I’d pick Josiah, Jacob, Jericho or Joshua. Wahaha. I just love biblical names that start with J. I dunno why.

I’ve said a million times that I want children. Biological, not adopted. No, I don’t wanna get married. And I’m not going straight. I just want kids. Even if it means I’ll have to knock someone up (to my disgust and horror). I wanna have kids BADLY. In fact, I have their whole lives planned for them. (I know that’s not really good parenting but eeeeeh.) So I already have names for my children this early. You see, I want four kids.

  1. Dresden Munich
  2. Athena Alexandria
  3. Geneva Sofia (Si Ruffa kasi, inagawan ako ng Venice)
  4. Kyiv Tashkent Cairo

Haha. Sorry, I named them after cities. I know it’s weird. But if my children won’t like it, they always have February 13 to change it. Wahaha.

How about you, guys?  Come on. If you were to pick a different name, what would it be?

VALENTINE’S DAY

So tomorrow is Valentine’s Day. And according to Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, Valentine’s day, it is a holiday invented by greeting card companies to make people feel like crap.

Take a look at statistics. The US Greeting Card Association estimated that around one billion valentine cards are being sent on this day each year worldwide. This makes this holiday the second largest card-spending day of the year, after Christmas. That’s a lot of cards.

And motel owners are happy!

Well, I don’t feel like crap on Valentine’s even when I’m single. I dunno. Our college barkada has a special tradition that we observe on this day. Those who are single among our circle of friends dine together at Chocolate Kiss in UP Diliman. We call ourselves the Single and Happy Club.

Take note, it’s not Single BUT Happy. It’s Single AND Happy Club.

And what’s amusing about it is that our membership has not changed a bit. It’s the same people every year! Haha.

It’s funny I’m always single on Valentine’s Day. I’ve had relationships before but they don’t really last long enough to invalidate my membership to the Single and Happy Club.

SINGLES AWARENESS DAY

Observed on February 15th, this day is for all singles to stand up, be proud and show that it is okay to be single. Hell, yeah.

Interestingly, the acronym for Singles Awareness Day is SAD. But whether singles around the world are sad or not, Singles Awareness Day is a reaction to Valentine’s Day by the people who are sick of the cheesiness and heavy commercialism of the day before.

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Il me peine aussi.

Posted on by Yoshke in Blurts, Love |

Coz I’m not capable of handling a relationship.
And I must be high when I thought I could. Or was too in love to think I could.

I guess I’m better off alone after all. Hahaaay. Single again.

images courtesy of ecocentric.co.uk

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’7-Night Stand’ Random Scene 1

Posted on by Yoshke in Flash Fiction, Love |

This is lifted from a screenplay I wrote for one of my college organizations. We were so prepared to shoot it but we had some problems. And by “problems,” I mean budget. It’s a romantic comedy tentatively called “7-Night Stand.” Anyway, this is just one scene.


34 EXT  ROOFTOP  -  Later that night

Marco and Nicole are on the rooftop. Lying on a mat on the floor. Next to each other. But with a foot distance between them. It’s almost midnight. The moon, their only light source. They have not said anything since the moment they reached the rooftop.

For the past few minutes, Nicole has been staring at Marco, who is staring at the moon. Her smile is uncertain.

Marco faces Nicole. Nicole turns her gaze to the moon.

Marco looks at Nicole intently. Marco smiles. It’s a genuine smile. Not even an ounce of bitterness to it.

Nicole  faces Marco. Marco turns his gaze to the moon.

Again, Nicole looks at Marco intently.

MARCO:
(eyes fixed on the moon; jokingly)
Tinititigan mo ako, ‘no?

NICOLE:
(embarrased)
Hindi ah. Baka ikaw.

MARCO:
Lalo namang hindi ako. Bakit naman kita tititigan?

Silence.

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