Love

EDSA

Posted on November 14, 2008 by Yoshke in Euphoria, Love |

It could have been a horrible Saturday.

I was in the passenger seat. It was a bit raining.

Normally, EDSA gets on my nerves. That’s why I thank God for the MRT. I may have had more than my share of almost-raped mornings while on it but it’s fast and my flat and office are a stone’s throw from train stations. I abhor travelling across the metropolis if not on the train. Like that night.

That Saturday night, the traffic was more terrible than usual. I don’t drive but I know that EDSA is so not a driver’s paradise road. Wrong waiting lanes. Misplaced U-turn slots. Yellow lanes. Stupid pink barricades. Uncivilised people crossing the road when and where they’re not supposed to. Air pollution. Water pollution (Pasig River). Noise pollution. Bayani Fernando Metro-Gwapo posters pollution. Disgusting urinals. And buses. Fucking buses.

Fucking buses.

And it’s always dark. My Geology professors said that Manila is one of the darkest cities in the world. Aaaaah, I just hate EDSA. I hate it, hate it, hate it.

I hate it.

That Saturday night, bumpy EDSA was being its usual self. We spent almost an hour stuck somewhere between Santolan and Cubao.

But he was holding my hand the entire time.

And he kissed me.

Then he looked around and then turned his gaze to me. And he smiled. Looked away. Kept his eyes straight ahead. “EDSA is unusually beautiful tonight,” he said.

It could have been a horrible Saturday. But he made all the difference.

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Break Free from Singularity:
Top 11 Ways to Find Your True Love

Posted on November 6, 2008 by Yoshke in Humor, Lists, Love |

It’s nice being single. You don’t have to worry about coming home late. You don’t need to remember a lot of important dates. You don’t need to be conscious about how you look. You don’t have someone to share popcorns with when watching a movie. You don’t have someone to tell you that it’s all gonna be okay when you have a problem. You have no one to grow old with. Yes, it’s nice being single. It’s sooo nice that all the miseries in the world are attributed to being alone. It may be nice but remember that you can only take too much niceness.

Sarcasm aside, being single may have its advantages but the truth remains the same: no one wants to be alone. That’s why we all strive to search the world for our one true love. If you’re single and you are miserably tired of it, it’s time to stop pitying yourself and start your worldwide search for the right person for you. The right person has always been out there. It’s just a matter of finding them. Here are 11 of the easiest ways to find your true lurv.

11. “Can I buy you a drink?”

If you are really serious about finding the person of your dreams, go out and look for him or her. One of the easiest ways to find your your Mr. or Ms. Perfect is to hang out in a bar. You will never find your would-be significant other inside your kitchen cupboard. Go out, have fun and meet people. There are many reasons why this is effective. First, this is where guys and girls who love to have fun go and if you’re that type, you just might find someone meant for you here. Second, alcohol gives you enough courage and confidence to introduce yourself. Some of the greatest love stories do not even get a chance to start because they are both afraid to make a move. What a shame.

Why you should do it: Even if you didn’t meet anyone, you still had your booze. Nothing to lose.

10. “Hi. ASL?”

On second thought, you can still look for the person of your dreams without leaving your house. All you need is a good Internet connection. The cyberspace has become an active social world for romance-seekers all over the planet. People who are looking for love sometimes find themselves surfing the net, logging into some networking sites or entering chat rooms, hoping to find the person of their dreams.

Although it is regarded as absurd by most people, we cannot deny the fact that there have been successful love stories that started through the Internet. In cyberspace, you’ll find all sorts of people; it is impossible you cannot find someone who matches your taste. What is harder to accomplish is finding a person that suits you AND who are serious about meeting people in the web.

Yes, the Internet bridges people from all over the world and allows them to find true love in an instant. You have to remember, however, that the cyberspace is not the safest place in the world to meet the person of your dreams. Without proper discretion and carefulness, your dream romance can turn into a nightmare. You have to explore the cyberspace carefully.

Why you should do it: Who cares? Everyone does it anyway.

9. “Peace be with you.”

Religious differences are sometimes blamed for unsuccessful relationships. If you want to be sure that you will be spiritually compatible with the person you want to meet, go to a church or a synagogue or a temple or whatever name your religion gives for your place of worship. It gives you a couple of advantages. First, religious difference would not be an issue. Second, you are sure that the person is spiritually healthy and responsible.

If you feel guilty doing this, don’t be. It is not like you are doing a blasphemous act. You are just practicing your religion. While you are at it, why not do some multi-tasking? You want to find the person of your dreams? Praying might be a big help. Just don’t hike your skirt a little higher.

Why you should do it: Hey, God said, “Be fruitful and multiply.” You’re just being obedient.

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Awkward

Posted on October 28, 2008 by Yoshke in Conversations, Humor, Love |

THE MAN IN THE OFFICE RESTROOM

Last Thursday, I entered the washroom but the two urinals were already taken so I figured I’d just use a cubicle. As I was walking towards the stalls, I accidentally knocked over a Starbucks tumbler sitting on the sink. It didn’t hit the floor but it made a loud noise still. One of the guys at the urinals turned to my direction.

OMG. OMG. OMG.

It was the cute guy I always see in the same restroom almost every day. I had told my officemate about him a number of times. There was a guy that for some strange reason, whenever I enter the men’s room, he’s always there. Coincidence. And my colleague would ask if he was cute and I would just smile.

Anyway, that tumbler, apparently, belonged to the cute guy. He gave me a strange look it made me so uneasy. And I muttered “Err, sorry.“

He would not look away, throwing me that, uhm, sexy (hihi) look. So I said again, “Uhm, sorry….“

He said it was OK. I handed him his tumbler and went into the cube. But before I could shut the door, he was able to half-enter the cube and said, “Hey, where’s your office?“

WTF?! Haha. I had never felt my bladder swell that way. “I’m sorry?” was my confused answer. I wasn’t sure I heard it right.

“Where’s your office? Where dya work?“

“703,” I replied.

He said something else but I knew that if I continued talking with him, I might be hurting someone I didn’t wanna lose. Besides, I really, really, REALLY gotta pee.

Before he could finish introducing himself and say his next interrogative sentence, I slammed the door on him. Well, not really “slammed.” Just closed it…. Fine! I slammed it. A little.

I haven’t seem him again since then. Maybe later. Haha. Kidding.

THE MAN ON THE TRAIN

A text conversation with Andre, one of my dearest friends, while I was embracing the almost innocuous discomfort that comes with the great sea of humanity on the MRT.

Yoshke: Hey Andre, you have plans for tonight? Let’s have dinner! Makati?
Andre: Oh, I’m meeting a friend here sa South. Sowee.
Yoshke: It’s alright. I texted Dane rin naman. We’ll have dinner together na lang.
Andre: Dane?! I’m losing track of your boys, Yoshke! Haha.
Yoshke: Dane. My housemate. You’ve met HER.
Andre: Aaaah. Akala ko another guy na naman.
Yoshke: Andre, right now, R%^# is the only guy I know, K?
Andre: Aaaw. Taraaay. I lovet!
Yoshke: Iba kasi ako magmahal no. Joke! Haha.
Andre: Pano? Carino brutal? Haha.
Yoshke: Why do I have this feeling that this conversation will lead to S&M (sadomasochism)?
Andre: Because you’re horny!
Yoshke: OMG, Andre! Yung katapat ko dito sa train is sooo hot. And siksikan sa train. His arm is on my chest. My face, almost on his shoulder.
Andre: OMG! Maputi? (Andre loves men with fair complexion.)
Yoshke: Kakulay ko.
Andre: OMG! Wetness.
Yoshke: Haha. And his chin and jaws are carpeted with uhm facial hair. Yeeeh. Kaso hindi sya mabango, ‘dre.
Andre: OK lang yan. At least, hindi sya mabaho!

And then I realised… Whatever happened to “R$%$ is the only guy I know”? Hahaha.

But seriously, R&^#W% is the only guy I know. I have banished everyone else out of my head.

THE MAN AT THE CAFE

“Why me?“

You said in a serious tone. And there I was thinking, nothing could be more awkward than our current set up. We were at the corner table at the Coffee Bean in Gateway. My chair was taller than yours and it was kinda irking me.

“Why me?“

If I didn’t know you better, I’d say you were fishing. But you’re not that kind. You don’t fish.

All I could say was a groundbreaking “I dunno.” I took another sip of my Guava whatever juice.

“Seriously. Back in Ateneo, there were other guys there and they were goodlooking. Why me?“

I began searching for an answer and I thought I knew where to look. I looked at your eyes, no, not your eyes. Your eyes aren’t the reason, I thought. Your hair, no, not your hair. Not your smile, either. Not the way you move nor the way you talk. I couldn’t find the answer so I just uttered a number of I-dunno‘s with uhms and errs in between.

I added, “But when I first saw you at that gathering in Ateneo, I told myself I gotta have you. I just knew right then that I wanted you. I dunno why and it doesn’t matter.“

You didn’t say anything.

I wonder if I could ever give you an answer that would suffice. Or any answer at all. I doubt it.

Because sometimes, it’s the things that we don’t know that keep us going — the future, Heaven, God. The Uncertain is the foundation of faith. And I have faith in myself that I will do anything to not lose you. Even though I can’t give you a reason.

I will never flirt with that cute guy in the office restroom. Or with any hot guy on the train. You never asked me to do this. But I want to. I want you, only you. And please don’t ask me why.

I just know.

image courtesy of themaskedblogger.com

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How to Survive Falling in Love
Without Getting Hurt*

Posted on September 30, 2008 by Yoshke in How To, Love |

1. Draw the line first. Know where you stand and how far you could go.
2. Never expect. It’s bad for you.
3. Never assume. It’s bad for everyone.

Yun lang.

*a repost, original published on my old blog
**photo courtesy of dudymas.wordpress.com

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Despondency

Posted on September 20, 2008 by Yoshke in Blurts, Emo, Love |

The comedy is that even after all this time, we’re still like this.
The tragedy is that we’re still like this.

And that’s just nasty. Oh well.

3 Comments

Recycled Conversations I: With Friends

Posted on September 4, 2008 by Yoshke in Conversations, Friends, Humor, Love |

Some of the most bloggable conversations I had with friends in the last three years. Allow me to repost them.

WITH MEAN CINEASTES

My friends from the university and I were playing Charades and the theme was movie titles. When an opponent, Jumar, drew Little Nicky, we thought it was a giveaway.

So when he started acting it out for his team, for the first word, he just leveled his palm at his hips and his team shouted Little right away. Hmmm. But Nicky was something less easy.

One of our team members was Monique, also known as Nikki. Monique is not the skinny type. She’s a bit, er… not the skinny type. It didn’t come as a surprise to us when the player who was acting out pointed to Nikki for the second word.

What we didn’t expect was when someone from his team shouted: “Pig? Little Pig?”

And they call me mean? Haha.

WITH A FOREVER-NAIVE FRIEND

A simple talk with a young friend (my ex’s brother) who was so unsure about how he felt.

Ken: How do you know if you’re in love?
Yoshke: I don’t think there are definite standard symptoms. You just know. That’s it. You just know. Why? Are you in love?
Ken: I don’t know.
Yoshke: You’re not in love.
Ken: What makes you so sure?
Yoshke: Cos you don’t know.

WITH MY PSEUDO-BROTHER

This convo I had with Josh on our way to FC Gloria’s Canteen for lunch after our French class the day before my birthday.

Josh: You already got a copy of Kitchie Nadal’s album?
Yoshke: No. But I borrowed a friend’s and listened to it last night.
Josh: How was it? You liked it?
Yoshke: One big NO. I only liked a couple of tracks. The record is rubbish.
Josh: Oh, don’t be so cruel on her. You’d probably appreciate the album more if you listen to it a little longer.
Yoshke: I don’t think so. Only a couple of songs really appealed to me.

After lunch, he handed me something in a white plastic bag.

Josh: Here. It’s my present. Happy birthday. But don’t open it yet. Open it after I leave.
Yoshke: Why? Is it some kind of a bomb or something?
Josh: No. Just open it when I’m gone. Trust me on this one. Happy Birthday.

So, he left and I opened the package and *SURPRISE SURPRISE*

It was Kitchie Nadal’s album. Aaaaw.

WITH A FEMINISM GODDESS

While at Seatle’s Best Katipunan, Tricia and I were talking about how I would always portray women as evil and pathetic in my films. She’s a cold-blooded feminist, by the way.

Yoshke: That’s not true! I don’t hate women! It’s just that if there’s a need for an evil or bad character in my films and I have a choice between a man and a woman, I tend to choose the woman.
Tricia: And why is that?
Yoshke: Cos I love men. Duh?

I was just kidding, by the way.

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Bros are Hos

Posted on September 2, 2008 by Yoshke in Love |

What’s with me and my friends’ brothers?

I know I promised myself not to fall for a friend but I seem to always end up dating my friends’ brothers. Hahaha. You can say that the first time is normal. The second, coincidence. But the third?

That’s a trend.

Or as one friend puts it, a “fetish.”

But no! No, no, no. It’s not like I intend to go out with guys who share the same DNA with my friends anyway. It’s just that, I don’t know. It just happens.

Funny because the friend always has no idea about the brother’s sexuality. Ah, they’re so straight. Or so it seems. You wouldn’t suspect he’s playing for the federation. The friend thinks we don’t talk. Or that the longest conversation we have had is “Hey, where’s your sister/brother?” When, in fact, we have been going out.

The sad thing is that we don’t really get there. But here I go again.

And oh, if you’re a friend, you better start interrogating your brothers. Hahaha. Squeeze ‘em hard! You might see him spitting out something. I don’t know. Something precious, maybe. Like gold. (Yeah, that’s a clue.)

Oh, he’s gonna kill me for this. Haha.

Read the full entry >>

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Protected: Bros Are Hos
(Unrated Version)

Posted on September 1, 2008 by Yoshke in Love |

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Walang Tawiran: Nakamamatay*

Posted on August 22, 2008 by Yoshke in Conversations, Friends, Love |

Status: Coz I try and try to walk away, but I know this crush ain’t goin’ away…
Music: Crush – David Archuleta

*Don’t cross: Deadly.

Another short conversation with a friend over Yahoo Messenger.

Yoshke: Done reading?
Robin: Aye aye. Sweet. Mushy.
Yoshke: Should I say “Thanks?”
Robin: lol. How come all your short, short, short stories are about friends falling in love?
Yoshke: NOT ALL. Just the ones I post on my blog.
Robin: Tell me, are you in love with a friend?
Yoshke: No.
Robin: Don’t tell me it’s me.
Yoshke: Whoah, is it just me or it really turned windy here in cyberspace?
Robin: Windy in cyberspace? You’re crazy.
Yoshke: And you’re presumptuous! Assuming much?
Robin: So why the fascination?
Yoshke: I just love writing about it but it doesn’t mean I’m in that predicament.
Robin: You’re in love with a friend. Who is it?
Yoshke: I am not.
Robin: Do I know him?
Yoshke: I am not in love with anyone.
Robin: One of your college friends? Office friends?
Yoshke: I will never be in love with a friend. I can’t be.
Robin: Oh, it’s one of those little rules you impose on yourself.
Yoshke: Yeah. And you know, when I like someone, I tell him right off.
Robin: Whore.
Yoshke: I meant, I don’t befriend someone just because I like him. Because once the friendship is drawn, there’s no crossing the line for me.
Robin: What if he’s the one to cross the line? /:]
Yoshke: A speeding truck will run him over. =))
Robin: lol
Yoshke: You see, next to family, I value friendships the most. And I don’t wanna screw it up just so I could be in a romantic relationship when I can just fall in love with someone else with which there’s no friendship to screw up.
Robin: Man, you ARE in love with a friend.
Yoshke: I am not! And I’m signing out if you say it again.
Robin: You’re in love with a friend.

I am not. Never have been. Never will be. I SWEAR.

…

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7 Missed Calls

Posted on August 8, 2008 by Yoshke in Flash Fiction, Love |

Note: Blogger’s original work. Don’t plagiarise. To those who would dare, as Ayn says it, may the wrath of heaven and earth fall upon you. This is fiction. Please see legal and ethical reminders on the sidebar. Thanks very much.

7 missed calls.

When I saw this flashed on my cellphone screen this morning, I knew my day would end this way. In a walk along this road connecting the college to Commonwealth Avenue. With you.

It’d been a while.

“How have you been?” Your voice was a bit shaky. If I didn’t know you better, I’d say you were nervous.

“Great,” I answered with a slice across my lower face. “And you? How’s London?”

“Well, it’s still London.” A slight laughter went through your lips.

And then, silence. I tried to come up with something to say to keep the conversation flowing but I couldn’t. I just felt I didn’t know you anymore. After two years of being away, I felt like nothing was ever the same with you.

You rebooted the conversation. “I want to tell you something.”

“Go ahead.”

You paused. Seemed hesitant to say it. “I’m leaving again. Next week. For good.”

“For Brisbane, I know. For what it’s worth, Australia is nearer than UK.”

“Yeah.”

And then, there was silence again. We were walking much more slowly than usual. I felt like I didn’t want to reach the end of this road.

“I want to tell you something.”

“You already told me.”

We reached the end of the road.

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About Yoshke

On May 31, 1985, tragedy struck when 41 tornadoes hit Canada and the US, leaving 76 people dead. At the same time, a doomed couple in the Philippines were having the best orgasms of their lives. Nine months (280 days) later, a healthy baby boy was brought into this world by normal delivery. That was exactly a week before Microsoft had its initial public offering.

Today, Yoshke Dimen resides independently in Mandaluyong City. He got a degree in Film from a university in Diliman but is now pursuing a career in Social Media.

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