From My Handwritten Journal: Not the Coffee Kind of Love

September 1, 2012 by 18 Comments
handwritten journal

I have no idea what had gotten into me. Maybe it was the rain or the slow ballads that I had been listening to the whole day. I was feeling a little down again, thinking about my childhood and the idea of talking to a shrink came up again but the idea did not live that long. Before I knew it, I was digging my box of old notebooks. I keep a handwritten journal. I still do. Earlier this afternoon, while trying to find something to read, I stumbled upon one of my handwritten diaries. I spent the next 30 minutes smiling, laughing, and sometimes offended by my own words. Haha. Anyway, I decided … [Read more...]

Filed Under: Emo, Love Tagged With: , , ,

A Sharp Memory

June 24, 2012 by 10 Comments
maskman sentai

It was a weekly event. Every Saturday morning, all the kids in the neighborhood, including myself, gathered at the living room of my grandfather's house to watch Maskman (a Japanese Super Sentai series similar to Bioman and Power Rangers). Just like every other kid there, I grew up in a poor family and my grandfather was the only one in the complex with a television set. I remember that the brand of the TV was Sharp. And that it was black-and-white --- oh I certainly remember that. While many households elsewhere were already using color TV sets, we watched a children's show which … [Read more...]

Filed Under: Emo, Family Tagged With: , ,

Abandoned Dreams and New Found Being

May 15, 2012 by 16 Comments
Bottles of dreams

A bittersweet smile cut across my face earlier as I browsed photos of my friends from the Foreign Service on Facebook. Four years ago, I was with them preparing for the series of the toughest exams, providing moral support to one another, sharing stories of excitement, fears, and dreams. While I am happy for them that they reached their dreams of becoming a diplomat, I can't help but wonder what could have been had I made it through. Today, they are probably helping in the formulation of foreign policies, assisting fellow Filipinos in other parts of the world, sharing insights on resolving … [Read more...]

Filed Under: Career, Causes, Emo, Euphoria, Featured Tagged With: , , ,

On Being 26 and Lost: The Birthday Post

March 9, 2012 by 17 Comments
lost in the city

I was drinking the other night and in between gulps of beer and shots of tequila, I realized that I still had not blogged about my birthday. I turned 26 last Tuesday. I have been busy. Yes, I quit my full-time job two months ago. Yes, I stay at home, in front of my laptop most of the time. You might be asking --- What the hell could I be busy with? Certainly NOT PORN. I can only wish I had time for that. The truth is, I am lost. I am happy but I am lost. I find it difficult to blog on Yoshke.com, my personal blog, because I feel like there's nothing to blog about. I am usually … [Read more...]

Filed Under: Emo, Web Tagged With: , , , ,

Twice I Heard Death

October 29, 2011 by 13 Comments
.

I was 10 when I heard it for the very first time. No one would look after me at home so my mother brought me along with her across the street to a neighbor's. She was one of my mother's bestfriends. My mom offered a crying shoulder and a helping hand to the family. As my mother did some chores in our neighbor's kitchen, I was left wandering around the house. In the living room of the house was a bed --- a deathbed --- and in it was my mother's friend, trying to catch her last breaths. Two of her children, both in their 30s, sat by the bed as they moved their ears closer to her mouth. She was … [Read more...]

Filed Under: Emo, Personal Life Tagged With: , , , , , , ,

Chestit Rojden Den, Plamen!

September 19, 2011 by 16 Comments
plamen chestit rojden den

"What's in Bulgaria that is well worth a visit?" I asked a friend when he suggested that I visit Bulgaria after telling him that my ultimate dream was to tour Europe. For the longest time, Bulgaria had no significance in my life. Back then this East European state was just another country to me. I knew that its capital is Sofia. I could correctly identify it on the map. But that was all. When I said I wanted to visit Europe, I meant Germany, France, Britain, Spain, Italy. Not Bulgaria. But something happened. Six years ago, I hit rock bottom. Weeks before my college graduation, family … [Read more...]

Filed Under: Emo, Friends, Personal Life Tagged With: , , , , , , ,

She Who Shines

August 16, 2011 by 22 Comments
asta shines

She came walking slowly towards me, sat beside me and introduced herself, "Hi! I'm Astrid." Her name means "star." "I'm Yoshke," I replied. Reluctantly, I shook her hand. "Nice to meet you." The whole thing was totally weird to me. It was the moment when, I think, she and I truly became friends. I wouldn't say we became inseparable since then but I missed her every time we were apart. From then on, we became distant companions. Although we lived miles away, I knew I could rely on her any damn time. She would text me whenever she was around and she would always invite me to an … [Read more...]

Filed Under: Conversations, Emo, Friends, Personal Life Tagged With: , , , , ,

Farewell, Friendster

May 4, 2011 by 12 Comments
friendster-logo

I'm so tempted to ask Friendster "What took you so long?" Friendster has become irrelevant for many people and many of us expected it was only a matter of time before they announce to wipe out user content posted on their site. Well, the day has come. A part of me is mourning. Although I have not logged into my Friendster account since, like, forever, I still like the idea of having my profile out there for my old friends to see. I can say that Friendster was the first full-blown social networking site that I joined. I was a college sophomore then, the latter months of … [Read more...]

Filed Under: Emo, Friends, University, Vanities, Web Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Sometimes We Burn to Live

April 24, 2011 by 37 Comments
burn-pic yosh

Whenever I meet people for the first time, it always happens. When they start their sentence with "I hope you don't mind me asking but," I know they are going to ask about what happened to my left arm. Most of my online friends are not aware that I have a huge third-degree burn covering my left arm almost entirely. I usually wear a coat but whenever I ditch long-sleeved clothes, this prominent scar is hard to miss. It always steals the spotlight. "I got it when I was four," is what I usually respond with. I was a sheltered kid. When I was little, my mother would never let me step out … [Read more...]

Filed Under: Emo, Family, Featured, Personal Life Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Hiraya Manawari, Hiraya Manawari…

January 10, 2011 by 47 Comments
hiraya manawari

The Holiday season is over. And if there's one thing I'm really thankful for, that's a chance to finally watch daytime TV. You see, I only get to watch weekday morning and afternoon shows during Christmas break and it's something I enjoy immensely. However, I couldn't help noticing how local morning programming had changed through the years. Today, Ben 10, Spongebob Squarepants, Mr. Bean and anime heroes lead the kiddie programs broadscast in the morning. As much as I love Spongebob and Ben 10, I am saddened by how locally produced educational TV shows have gone extinct from free TV. Lucky … [Read more...]

Filed Under: Emo, TV Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,