The Kite Runner (2007)
Genre: Drama; Director: Marc Forster
Stars: Khalid Abdalla, Zekeria Ebrehimi, Ahmad Khan Mahmidzada

Watching this movie is very much like flying a kite. When the kite takes off, it gets so high and exciting. The film can be divided into three parts; the first of which is brilliant. It revolves around the friendship of two Afghan boys. I’ve never been touched by a movie in a long time. It’s truly heartwarming and piercing at the same time. However, somewhere along the way, the string of the kite snaps and everything comes crashing down. The second and third parts of the film are utterly disappointing. I really wish they did not jump onto another period. The story of the two boys can stand alone.

Technically, it’s fantastic, too. Quite believable production design. Impressive cinematography. I didn’t really notice anything about the score or sound (which is a good thing, I guess). It’s a good film.

3.5

…

3:10 to Yuma (2007)
Genre: Western; Director: James Mangold
Stars: Russell Crowe, Christian Bale

I’m not really a fan of the Western genre but I really, really enjoyed watching this film. I admit, I only decided to see it because of my Christian Bale but I didn’t expect much from the movie itself. Surprisingly, it was one hell of a ride. I was literally gripping on the edge of my seat. Never a dull moment. I felt like I was traveling with the characters and that anytime, some gay cowboy (redundant, I know) would shoot me. It is really effective. Not to mention the superb performances by Bale and Crowe. The ending isn’t as moving as the filmmakers might have intended it to be. In fact, it was kinda lame. Ehehe. Anyway, awesome, awesome sound design, editing, production design and cinematography. Really enjoyable.

…

The Eye (2008)
Genre: Horror; Directors: David Moreau, Xavier Palud
Stars: Jessica Alba

I like watching horror films at the cinemas because I love screaming inside the theatre. But this film— It’s terrible. All I could let out were my expressions of disappointment. Not even a single “waaah.” This movie is not creepy or scary. It relies heavily on the element of surprise and not fear. It relies heavily on sound to freak out its audience and not the story. I didn’t enjoy it. Everything is forgettable. I can’t pick a single scene that gave me goosebumps. It’s like a one-night stand. Everything feels good at the moment. But once you step out of the theatre, there’s nothing you would remember. Unlike “The Ring,” “The Others,” or other contemporary horror films, it won’t haunt you once the film is over. There’s nothing to remember. And mind you, I haven’t even seen the original Hong Kong movie. Awful horror flick. Waste of time. Waste of money.

1.0

*gif icons courtesy of myemo.com

Top 50-41, 40-31, 30-21, 20-11. Whoah. And now, ladies and gentlemen, please welcome my top 10 all-time favourite films….

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10. Finding Nemo (2003)

Genre: Comedy
Director: Andrew Stanton, Lee Unkrich
Starring: Albert Brooks, Ellen DeGeneres, Alexander Gould
Plot: 71% of the Earth’s surface is covered by water. That’s a lot of space to find one fish.
Top Critics’ Average Mark: 100% — WOW!!!

“I shall call him Squishy. And he shall be mine. And he shall be my Squishy.”

The only animated movie in my list, Finding Nemo is one movie that I really, really enjoyed. I was alone when I watched it in a theatre. (I know, what a loser.) But I still couldn’t help laughing. After the film, I stayed inside and watched it again. Hahaha. My favourite character is Dory and Crush, the turtle. Had I extended this list to Top 100, you’d find a number of animated films including Beauty and the Beast, Lion King, and Monsters, Inc.
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9. (tied) Chicago (2002)

Genre: Musical
Director: Rob Marshall
Starring: Renee Zellweger, Catherine Zeta-Jones, Richard Gere
Plot: Murderesses Velma Kelly and Roxie Hart find themselves on death row together and fight for the fame that will keep them from the gallows in 1920s Chicago.
Top Critics’ Average Mark: 92%

“With the right song and dance, you can get away with murder.”

From its well choreographed dance sequences, entertaining songs, impressive acting performances, excellent direction, and all that jazz, Chicago deserves a slot in my Top 10. However, until now, I still don’t think that it deserves the Oscar Best Picture award. Although Renee Zellweger did a fantastic job giving life to Roxie Hart, Catherine Zeta Jones steals the movie with her Velma Kelly character.

…

9. (tied) Moulin Rouge (2001)

Genre: Musical
Director: Baz Luhrmann
Starring: Nicole Kidman, Ewan McGregor
Plot: A poet falls for a beautiful courtesan whom a jealous duke covets in this stylish musical, with music drawn from familiar 20th century sources.
Top Critics’ Average Mark: 65% Aaaw

“The greatest thing you’ll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return.”

This is the fourth in my list and the first of three Nicole Kidman-starrers in my Top 10. Moulin Rouge is filled with so much elements that only this movie can pull off. As what Bebs might call it, this is a “pastiche.” But what I like most, aside from MY Nicole Kidman, is how they used familiar songs like Roxanne, Like a Virgin, and Smells Like Teen Spirit. I cried twice — the part when they are singing Come What May, and the part when Satine dies. The production design is fantabulous. And every scene is spectacular, spectacular! This should have won the Oscar Best Picture that year, and not A Beautiful Mind. Nicole should have received the Best Actress nod and not Halle Berry. (Nicole Kidman is love, love, love. I loooooooove her.)

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This is a very lengthy post so no much intro needed now. Just a reminder, this is not a list of the best movies for me, this is my favourites list. If you missed the bottom 30 movies, check these out: Top 50-41, 40-31, 30-21. A’right. Back to the countdown….

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20. The Blair Witch Project (1999)
Genre: Horror
Director: Daniel Myrick, Eduardo Sanchez
Starring: Heather Donahue, Michael Williams, Joshua Leonard
Plot: In October of 1994, three student film makers disappeared in the woods near Burkittesville, Maryland. One year later, their footage was found.
Top Critics’ Average Mark: 88%

“I’m afraid to close my eyes, I’m afraid to open them.”

The second of the only two horror films in this list (the other is The Others), The Blair Witch Project is a great horror movie. There was no monster or ghost shown but it really scared the hell out of me. And I watched it already knowing that this did not happen for real. But still, I was blown away. Scary, scary, scary.

…

19. (tied) American Beauty (1999)
Genre: Drama
Director: Sam Mendes
Starring: Kevin Spacey, Annette Bening
Plot: Lester Burnham, a depressed suburban father in a mid-life crisis, decides to turn his hectic life around after developing an infatuation for his daughter’s attractive friend.
Top Critics’ Mark: 93%

“Remember those posters that said, ‘Today is the first day of the rest of your life?’ Well, that’s true with every day except one: the day that you die.”

Everybody was talking about this film and I just couldn’t care less. For starters, I thought, what could be interesting about suburbia. I thought suburbia was boring. And then after watching it, I realised that was exactly the point. Suburbia is boring but it doesn’t mean that nothing is happening.

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I’ve just finished preparing penne carbonara. Yum yum. But Gawd, I’m exhausted. And I refuse to eat it with parmesan cheese since Dam-dam used the poor cheese as a metaphor for his dandruff. GROSS!

And there’s an epidemic affecting Film graduates in the blogosphere. First it was Ayn with her Top 70 Favourite Films. And then myself. And now, Dam-dam is starting to feature his Top 80. And Lei, Top 20. Come on, come on. Let’s compare afterwards. Hehehe.

Anyway, we’re almost halfway to my Top 10. If you missed the first two sets, you can find them here (50-41) and here (41-30). Moving on…

30. The Devil Wears Prada (2006)

Genre: Comedy
Director: David Frankel
Starring: Meryl Streep, Anne Hathaway
Plot: A naive young woman comes to New York and scores a job as the assistant to one of the city’s biggest magazine editors, the ruthless and cynical Miranda Priestly.
Top Critics’ Average Mark: 82%

“A million girls would kill for this job.”

Opening this batch is the very unforgiving Miranda Priestley and her two assistants Emily and Emily Andy. I soooo love Meryl Streep in this movie. Not her best performance but still truly unforgettable. Although some people may find this movie typical, formulaic or another ugly duckling tale or whatever, no one can say anything bad about its witty dialogues, terrific acting performances, and the gorgeous costumes and the uber-hot women wearing them especially Emily Blunt. If I had to judge a film just for its entertainment value, I’d give this a 100. Really funny movie. That’s all.

29. Closer (2004)

Genre: Drama
Director: Mike Nichols
Starring: Julia Roberts, Jude Law, Clive Owen, Natalie Portman
Plot: The relationships of two couples become complicated and deceitful when the man from one couple meets the woman of the other.
Top Critics’ Average Mark: 74%

“If you believe in love at first sight, you never stop looking.”

This is the only Julia Roberts-starrer in this list. Ehehehe. A cynical way of looking at relationships, Closer was publicised as the more realistic look at love. And true enough, it was very realistic. And by realistic, I mean “painful.” It’s all about lies. About cheating. About love. About longing. About confusion. About relationships. About Natalie Portman. She’s ravishing. Hehehehe.

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A’right. I think it’s time to go back to my countdown of my most-adored movies. If you missed the first set (50-41), click here. Anyway, I have to remind you again that this is not a list of the greatest films in history but my favourites. This list is very personal. And of course, my taste may not jive with yours. You can rant all you want if you find anything disagreeable, see if I care. (Taray!)

Anyway, on with the next batch. Popcorns ready? Here it goes.

40. Batman Movies: Batman (1989), Batman Returns (1992), Batman Forever (1995), Batman and Robin (1997), Batman Begins (2005)

Genre: Adventure, Action
Director: Tim Burton, Joel Schumacher, Christopher Nolan
Starring: Michael Keaton, Jack Nicholson, Kim Basinger; Michelle Pfeiffer, Danny deVito; Val Kilmer, Nicole Kidman; George Clooney, Chris O’Donnell, Alicia Silverstone, Uma Thurman, Arnold Schwarzenegger; Christian Bale, Katie Holmes
Plot: Billionaire Bruce Wayne walks the fine line between justice and vengeance as he fights crime as the Batman.
Top Critics’ Average Mark: 59%

“It’s not who you are underneath, it’s what you do that defines you.”

The best of all Batman movies, definitely, is Batman Begins. My friend and movie buddy, Ayn, (ay, may ganun?) wrote on her own list: “Oh, I admit it. I just wanted to put a Batman movie in the list because I love Batman. I’ve been in love with Batman ever since I was a little kid. I think I actually wanted to be Batman at some point. Yes, I even love Batman Forever, if only for Nicole Kidman. One thing I love about Batman movies is the absence of America-as-the-world’s-superhero theme that is present in the Superman and Spiderman franchises… I’m so excited for next chapter of Batman (The Dark Knight) coming 2008 with Christian Bale, Maggie Gyllenhaal, Heath Ledger, Aaron Eckhart and Gary Oldman.”

Howkeeey. Ayn already said pretty much EVERYTHING I want to say. Fine. But I disagree with her about something. She deliberately excluded “Batman and Robin” from her list because she didn’t like it. (How could you, Ayn?! How could you?!) I liked it. And oh, this is the second Nicole Kidman-starrer in my list.

Christian Bale, you are my superhero. I mean, Batman.

39. Harry Potter Movies: The Prisoner of Azkaban (2004), The Goblet of Fire (2005), The Order of the Phoenix (2007)

Genre: Adventure
Director: Alfonso Cuaron, Mike Newell, David Yates
Starring: Daniel Radcliffe, Emma Watson, Rupert Grint
Plot: A young boy with a great destiny proves his worth while attending Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.
Top Critics’ Average Mark: 83%

“It is not our abilities that show what we truly are… it is our choices.”

I’ll be lying if I say that I didn’t like the first two Harry Potter movies. I liked them, too. But I was not as crazy over them as I was over the last three adaptations. But the best in the series is the third installment, The Prisoner of Azkaban. It is the only movie that I can say “better than the book.” But then of course, it’s not fair to Newell and Yates because they had to adapt such a thick book to just a two-hour magical experience. But still, Cuaron is really the best. One thing that amazes me is how they would cast people who actually look like the way I imagined them to be when I was reading the book. Luna Lovegood, for example, I swear, that was exactly how I imagined her. I loove her. She’s adorable. Anyways, sometimes I wish this whole Potter thing not to end. At least, I have something to look forward to every year. Oh well, that’s life.

38. Pirates of the Caribbean Movies: The Curse of Black Pearl (2003), Dead Man’s Chest (2006), At World’s End (2007)

Genre: Adventure, Comedy, Fantasy
Director: Gore Verbinski
Starring: Johnny Depp, Keira Knightley, Orlando Bloom
Plot: Damn, this is hard. According to Ayn: a pirate’s life.
Top Critics’ Average Mark: 47% Aaaw

“You’ll have the chance to do something… something courageous. And when you do, you’ll discover something. That you’re a good man.”

I don’t like Johnny Depp. But I loooooooove Captain Jack Sparrow, and for that, okie, I like Johnny Depp. (Agh, can’t make up my mind. Help!) And what do I like about these movies? Hmmmm. Do I really have to say anything? Whatever I say, it won’t change the fact that you LOVED these films. And that you will still watch the next Pirates films…. Er, and yeah, I just can’t think of anything to say. Ehehehehe.

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Status: Tweetums, ehehehe
Music: Always Come Back to Your Love - Samantha Mumba

The American Film Institute has just released an updated version of their 100 Greatest American Movies list. And Ayn has just completed her Top 70 Favourite Films. So I guess it’s my turn to publish my own list — my Top 50 All-Time Fave Films.

Hmmm. Why Top 50? I don’t know. It was originally 40. Then changed it to 44 to give slots to a few films I had forgotten about. And now it’s 50 because I broke some of the tie-ups — you know, multiple films sharing one rank. So now it’s final. Fifty. Final. Promise. But then of course, when I change my mind again, blame my fickle-ness. Whatever.

Anyway, a few notes: I haven’t seen Schindler’s List, Memento, A Clockwork Orange and Requiem for a Dream yet so don’t expect to see them on this list. And remember that this is not a countdown of the best films in history but my personal favourite films — movies I enjoyed the most.

OK, here we go.

50. The Lord of the Rings - Trilogy (2001-03)
Genre: Epic, Fantasy
Director: Peter Jackson
Based on: The Lord of the Rings by JRR Tolkien
Starring: Elijah Wood, Viggo Mortensen, Andy Serkis
Plot: A young Hobbit has been entrusted with an ancient Ring. Now he must embark on an epic quest in order to destroy it.
Top Critics’ Average Mark: 98%

“One ring to rule them all, One ring to find them, One ring to bring them all and in the darkness bind them.”

To be honest, when the first film The Fellowship of the Ring was released, I wasn’t excited. The whole Lord of the Rings thing did not appeal to me in any way. Not even Orlando Bloom. Haha. I even said that the only thing that I might like about it was Cate Blanchett. I never read the book. I never even bothered to see this in a theatre. I only began liking it when I watched The Two Towers, which became my fave film in the trilogy. And since then, I’d considered this trilogy as one fantastic film.

49. Citizen Kane (1941)
Genre: Drama, Mystery
Director: Orson Welles
Starring: Orson Welles, Joseph Cotten, Dorothy Comingore
Plot: Following the death of a publishing tycoon, news reporters scramble to discover the meaning of his final utterance: ‘Rosebud.’
Top Critics’ Mark: 100% WOW

“Some called him a hero. Others called him a heel…”

OK, film critics, you can cringe now. The film that every film organisation in this world considers The Greatest Film of All Time is only my #49. The film is brilliant. But sadly, I didn’t make any connection to the story, and that’s always a big thing for me. I need to relate. But it is a very entertaining and artistic film. And yeah, classic. Might really be the greatest film ever made. Every scene and shot was well-thought out. Every element means something. Every camera angle. Every prop. Every movement. Every space used, and unused. Greatest. But maybe I prefer something uh contemporary.

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Genre: Sci-Fi, Thriller
Director: Oliver Hirschbiegel
Stars: Nicole Kidman, Daniel Craig, Jeremy Northam, Jackson Bond

I am a big sci-fi fan. And an even bigger Nicole Kidman fan. For me, there’s nothing more entertaining than seeing a sci-fi film. And there’s nothing more rewarding than seeing moving images of Nicole Kidman (die Keith Urban, die! nah, I love Keith, too) projected on the big screen. So imagine how ecstatic I was feeling yesterday when I was just about to watch “The Invasion,” the third remake of the 1956 film “The Invasion of Body Snatchers.” And when I finally did, ah, it was just heaven. I felt like leaving Earth for an hour and a half and felt happier upon coming out of the theatre.

A lot of people might throw rocks at me now. The movie is not perceived by many as good. In fact, they say it’s horrible. Seeing these reviews, I might be the only one in this planet who actually liked this film. But I really did. It is not the best film of the year, but it’s good.

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Genre: Drama, Romance
Director: Maryo J. Delos Reyes
Stars: Aga Muhlach, Angelica Panganiban, Maricel Soriano

This was the first local movie of the year that I swore I would definitely watch. Although I already knew what the twist was weeks before its first screening, I was still as excited as hell. In fact, I promised Tonet to watch it with her but since she couldn’t find time, I forgot about the promise and saw the movie alone. And when I went out of the theatre after watching this latest Star Cinema offering, all I could say was “WOW.”

The film is not just impressive, it’s excellent. And there are many factors that contribute to its brilliance. First, the story is simple. As the title conspicuously tells us, it’s a film about love. But more specifically, it carefully discusses marriage. It’s the usual couple-mistress story but tackled in a way that will make you think and ask so many questions. What is right? What makes me happy? Will the right make me happy? Is choosing what makes me happy right? What do I choose? This film is a great proof that sometimes, it’s not the story that matters but how we tell the story.

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Genre: Romance
Director: Bb. Joyce Bernal
Stars: Piolo Pascual, Regine Velasquez

I was able to watch this film last week for free. To be honest, I really had no plan of watching this movie. Let’s just say that Tonet, a friend who was a part of this production, was very persistent and forceful, and she gave me a movie pass so I could watch it for free. It’s actually hard for me to write this review because everybody knows I love Direk Joyce Bernal but it doesn’t necessarily mean that I loved all her flicks. And Paano Kita Iibigin is one of those films — the ones I didn’t love. Not even like.

Piolo Pascual is Lance, a man who succumbed to his guilt after his wife and two other friends died in a car accident just hours after their wedding. Since then, he has tried to kill himself again and again. Until he meets Martee, Regine Velasquez, a struggling, lonely single-mom desperately trying to raise her much-loved asthmatic son.

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Genre: Comedy, Romance
Director/Writer: Sue Kramer
Stars: Heather Graham, Thomas Cavanagh, Bridget Moynahan

I have to admit that I didn’t really want to watch Gray Matters. I was just about to get tickets for Sunshine when I found out that it was Heather Graham who stars in this lesbian flick. I have always loved Heather Graham since she starred opposite Mike Myers in Austin Powers: The Spy who Shagged Me. She has this irresistible charm that whenever I see her face on a movie poster, I always end up watching that movie. But enough of Heather. Let’s talk about the film —- it was bad.

Yes, if there’s only one word that could best describe Gray Matters, that would be it: bad. As in BAD. But first, what is the film all about? It’s about Gray (Heather Graham) who has a brother, Sam (Thomas Cavanagh), whom she is very close to that they are often mistaken as a couple. Both in their thirties, they live in the same apartment, share secrets, are perfect dance partners, etc. And then they met Charlie (Bridget Moynahan), an oh-so-perfect creature of God — beautiful, sexy, smart, successful, lovable, perfect. After their first date, Sam asked Charlie to marry him and she said “yes.” The night before the wedding, Charlie, drunk and unaware of what she’s doing, kisses Gray and this messes up Gray’s sanity and turns her life inside out. Gray is bothered and has not forgotten about it, and then realises she’s a lesbian… and that she’s madly in love with Charlie.

There you go. Okay, on with the bashing. This movie is writer/director Sue Kramer’s first. And I just have to say this: if your up & coming movies are all gonna be like this, then please don’t bother us with them anymore. Find another planet and bore them with your crap. The screenplay is trashy and so unrealistic. Getting married after one date? Oh come on. That’s obnoxious. If you want the mainstream audience to relate to this film, you should’ve done better than coming up with that, er, idiocy.

There are many attempts to make the audience laugh (because hey, it’s a comedy) but only a few work because they lack wit and sensibility. And those scenes which turned out to be funny, however, like that frappuccino on the wedding dress scene, are so unoriginal. You see, it’s always either not-funny or funny-but-unoriginal. Plus, the characters all talk like they were writers rejected by every publishing house there is in this world. The script is filled with metaphors that make you go, “huh?”. And they all speak so fast you just want them to shut up.

The cinematography lacks dynamics. (Gawd, I hate the composition of the shots.) The production design is just OK. The editing is average. The only good thing about this ridiculous flick is Heather’s character Gray. She’s the only one that looks and sounds like a human being here. The others are just mere caricatures you barely notice them.

But if you’re gonna watch this film because of the gay/lesbian element, then go ahead. It’s not everyday that a gay film with a happy ending is produced.

But really, this movie is so bad, not even Heather Graham’s charm can save this flick.

1.5