I hate it when my friends talk about Bioman. Why? Because I can’t relate. I can’t remember even a single moment I watched Bioman. I don’t know what their powers were and what they could do. I don’t know its theme song, either. I remember Shaider, Ultraman, Koseidon, He-Man, She-Ra, Conan the Barbarian, Maskman, and Power Rangers. But Bioman? Nah. Na-uh. Nadah. Not really.
Funny because my earliest childhood memory was when I was 3 years old. (I’m 22; born 1986.) I remember a lot. As in A LOT. There is a myriad of vivid childhood images that I always play in my head. Sadly, none of those images are Bioman’s. Maybe because I didn’t watch it at all. You see, I’ve always been choosy. Haha.
Another kiddie TV classic that I just can’t remember watching? Batibot. Seriously. I don’t have any emotional connection to the show, Pong Pagong, Kuya Bodjie or Ate whoever-she-was. Every time I try to rummage through my thoughts and search for a bit of any Batibot-related memory, what I always find is ATBP (Awit, Titik, Bilang na Pambata) — Trisha, Rex, Carlo, Tito Miguel (Piolo Pascual), and that ridiculous Kapitan Bilang. No Batibot.
You might be thinking that I missed a great deal of my childhood and how great a loser I was when I was a kid for not watching these programs. But I think I had a childhood that many would envy. It’s just that TV wasn’t really that fun for me that time. Fun was outdoors. You see, I was a country boy. Haha. Lumaki ako sa lalawigan ng magigiting (Batangas). Less than a kilometer north of our house are woods and hills; south, a vast field and the beach. TV wasn’t that fun. Fun were the following:
flying/running kites
wandering around and playing hide-and-seek in the forest
climbing trees
stealing fruits from some farmer’s orchard
shooting birds with a slingshot (I was cruel as a kid)
hunting spiders for fights on stick
catching fireflies and grasshoppers
catching salagubang (June beetle), cutting its legs one by one, and letting it fly while tied to my wrist
Those were my definition of fun even after I was introduced to Sarah, Cedie, Remi, Julio, Julia, Mary, Romeo, another Remi, Tom, Huck, Cinderella, and the rest of them losers. And then, the magnificent world of violent anime. Haha. Starting with Sailormoon. (Er, okay, violent gay anime. Haha.) Zenki, B’t X and Thunder Jet soon followed. And then, the wacky Mojacko and Doraemon.
And oh, I remember being addicted to Superbook and Flying House. Thanks to my Catholic upbringing.
REEVED UP
I am currently addicted to Jason Reeves and his music. Thanks to Berg. I especially liked “Reaching” and “Someone Somewhere.” Cool mixture of folk, acoustic and alternative. He’s absolutely awesome. And don’t just take my word for it, see for yourself and listen well.
SOMEBODY BUY ME THIS ALBUM!!! Come on. Give me a copy of this and I’ll love you forever!
…
ALMOST ROMANTIC
As the hot doctor advised me, I’ve been on 1000 mg of pure vitamin C per day for more than a month now because my body’s relationship with infections and diseases is almost romantic. The funny thing is, I still catch a cold every now and then. (Told ya, it’s almost romantic.) Damn. Sometimes I feel like infections and my body are ganging up on me. (Yeah, like in college, haha.)
…
QUITTING NICOTINE
Since my last tonsilitis, I haven’t touched a cigarette. Er, maybe once. Aright, fine, twice. Twice. Believe me, only twice. Hey, that’s good enough! It’s been two months and I have smoked only two sticks. Er, maybe more.
I promised myself that I would devote my Sunday mornings to football (soccer). Last week, my friends Jon and Aika were with me playing at the Sunken Garden in UP Diliman. It rained but we still went on. Football in the rain. Woooh. This is the life. Haha.
I’m am not the athletic type. Certainly not. But it doesn’t mean that I have no interest in sports. I love sports. In fact, when I was in high school, I was our school paper’s Sports Editor (and Associate Editor and Layout Artist and Photojournalist). I was also my school’s representative to sport/Physical Education quiz bees, because of which I have travelled many places. In college, I was first a Sports Science major before shifting out to Film.
Although it doesn’t really show, I am madly in love with sports — especially football, tennis and bowling. I am not great (not even good) at any of them but heck, I absolutely always have fun playing.
FOOTBALL
I don’t remember exactly when I fell in love with football. I have always hated basketball and volleyball. Maybe because when I was a kid, I couldn’t play well because of my then useless left arm. So since I couldn’t move my left arm, I started kicking basketballs around the garden. I started playing futsal in grade school but I never really became good at it. It was my biggest frustration.
Then I got addicted to watching football on TV. I instantly became a Bayern Munich and Chelsea fan. During the 2002 Japan/Korea World Cup, I began admiring Miroslav Klose, who is my ultimate idol right now.
One of my most prized possessions is my Adidas 2006 Germany World Cup ball. I don’t let anyone play with it unless I’m watching. Haha. I bought it out of utter sadness after Germany lost to Italy in the semi-final match. It was darn expensive but heck, I was lonely.
Again, I’m devoting my Sunday mornings to football. So if one Sunday morning, you see someone playing football at the Sunken Garden who looks as if he doesn’t know what he’s doing, that’s probably me. Haha.
Status: All right now.
Music: You’re So Vain - Brooke White, All Right Now - David Cook
Me with my cousins. Second pic: Yep, that’s me, leftmost. Gawd, I’ve just noticed that I was holding a green sausage-shaped balloon. Was that a sign? A foreshadowing? Haha.
Exactly a year ago, my family had a little dinner party. We invited some relatives and friends and had some fun. But that’s about it. Nothing really special.
Two years ago, I was so sick. But I was able to travel from Batangas to Manila, and meet some of my friends at the university. I planned to watch Pride and Prejudice with Josh, but I backed out the last minute because my body couldn’t withstand my aching joints and terrible fever. When I felt a little better hours later, I decided to just push through with the movie thing but because Josh couldn’t make it that night, Andre joined me instead. We spent the rest of the night at Figaro.
Three years ago, Josh gave me a Kitchie Nadal album, and we had lunch at Oz Cafe — my treat. We stayed there longer than we intended to. That night, I had dinner with Ayn. I can’t remember where, but I know I gave her a treat.
Six years ago, I saw a movie in a theatre in Lemery with my girlfriend back then, Michi, and some of my friends. Again, I can’t remember what movie we watched that day. But I know I was really, really happy. (It was Pearl Harbor pala.)
Twelve years ago, my mum threw a very lavish party for me at our place in Batangas. Most of my classmates and teachers were present. It was one of the most expensive parties my mum had ever thrown.
Twenty-two years ago, a midwife was pulling me out of my mother’s womb as my Daddy watched. It was a very bloody day.
Yep! Today I turned 22! Happy Birthday to ME!
Honestly, this is the first time since High School that I really anticipated my birthday.
It’s Victor’s 22nd birthday today. (Yes, he was born just when thousands of people gathered in EDSA for the first People Power Revolution in 1986.)
Victor is my bestfriend. He’s been my bestest friend since Kindergarten. Seriously. We’ve known each other since we were four. That makes us friends for almost 18 years. That’s 4/5 of our lives. Hehe. So today, I just wanna greet him.
He has no idea that this blog exists, thus there is very little chance he’d come across this post but what the heck? Yep, Victor doesn’t know I blog because he doesn’t have to know about my sexuality. Hehehe. Some bestfriend I am.
###
I was born nine days after Victor. But since it’s leap year, my birthday is still 10 days away. Hmmm. This is the first time I’m gonna do this: make my own wishlist. Hehe. Come on, it’s my birthday. Just let me do this.
a new football / soccer ball
a fashionable vest
a small sling bag
a pair of tennis rackets
a Giordano or Diego shirt (yeah, brand matters)
Bvlgari Aqva perfume
a pirated DVD showcase (hehehe)
Gerard Butler (yum)
Christian Bale (yum, yum)
and you. You know who you are. I want you for my birthday. haha.
Well, that’s all. See? I’m not even that materialistic. Haha.
###
Anyway, since we’re already talking about birthdays, let me just say that February is one of my favorite months. Unlike January with which I’ve always had a love-hate relationship, Feb has been consistently kind to me. Aside from that, most of my friends said their first hellos to the world in these months.
1 - Josh De Beauvoir, Dah Venturanza
6 - Victor Villanueva
10 - Sol Garcia, Aina Pacion
14 - Robin Rodriguez
21 - Andre Montejo
24 - Rico Pangilinan
26 - Jumel Alilio, Ces Vitan
27 - Pam Condeno, Jordan Santos
28 - Hermann Claravall
Status: I’d walk with my people if I could find them.
Music: Deep Inside of You - Third Eye Blind
Last Friday our team had a party at Lauren’s place as a part of our semimonthly office gatherings. There were lotsa fun, food, and of course booze. Among my officemates, there were only a few people who knew about my sexuality — Bridget, who used to be my classmate in UP; Aika, who is also from UP; Chemae, who said she could be bisexual so I confessed to her, too; and Jon, a straight guy whom I volunteered the information to when we were having a drink two weeks ago. But I’m sure others had a clue. I mean, with all my YM status messages, it was pretty obvious.Perhaps, some were just afraid to ask.
Anyway, back to the party we had a drinking-slash-honesty game called “never-have-i-ever.” In this game, a player says a statement beginning with “never have I ever.” For example, “Never have I ever had sex.” All those who have had sex MUST drink. Then another player says another statement. It’s really a nice way to get drunk, hihi.
My officemates came up with statements like:
Never have I ever had flunked a Math subject. (I didn’t drink.)
Never have I ever slept at work. (I didn’t drink.)
Never have I ever been attracted to anyone in the office. (I didn’t drink.)
Never have I ever had sex in a public place. (I didn’t drink.)
Never have I ever had sex with a stranger. (I didn’t drink.)
I thought, Heck, when will I have to drink? And then came Chemae with her very provocative statement:
Never have I ever had sex with someone from the same sex.
I drank. Bottom’s up.
Wow. The reactions varied widely. Disbelief was painted on some of them. I heard a couple of oh-my-gawd’s. Some are shocked. Lauren kept yelling at me (more like cursing, really). Others weren’t surprised at all giving me an “I-knew-it” look. The ones who knew had a grin slashed on their faces. Their eyes glued to the man of the moment — ME.
I said defensively, “What? Whoever said I was straight?!”
Yep, I didn’t tell them about my sexual orientation but I never told them I was straight. Besides, they never asked. “Coming out” to them was not a good feeling. But it wasn’t bad, either. Until now, I’ve been thinking if I did the right thing. Sometimes I think that maybe I should’ve just kept it to myself and enjoy the idea of my colleagues thinking I’m straight. You know, some things are better left unsaid. But it was an honesty game. And I was just being honest.
My sexuality is something that I am not proud of, but I am not ashamed of, either. I don’t usually volunteer the information. I only tell a person when I’m asked. It was never an issue for me (unless when the person asking knows my family or is family).
So far, I still haven’t felt the aftermath of my honesty. That night, there was no tension or friction or discomfort or whatsoever. Heck, they were all drunk. Today that work resumes, I shall know.
One thing is for sure, though: I do not and will not regret the moment that I drank that glass of beer.
Status: Damn cold.
Music: Nobody Wants to be Lonely - Ricky Martin & Christina Aguilera
Gawd, it took me six days before finally updating this blog. Still uber-busy. Nevertheless, I am still glad to announce that it’s been nine days since I last touched a cigarette. This is because my heart has been aching like hell. No, I’m not being schmaltzy. That’s not figurative. I’m talking about the organ (no, not that organ, silly, much higher). You know the organ that pumps blood called “heart.” Right, that organ. It hurts. So I stopped smoking. I can’t believe I survived nine days without nicotine, caffeine, and beer. That’s an accomplishment. I’ve been rewarding myself with too much yogurt with live microorganisms (Nancy Castiglione, ikaw ba yan?). Yum yum. I have to keep this up.
Anyway, being excruciatingly busy at work, I’ve been desperately struggling to find something enjoyable. Yahoo Messenger has become my only source of relaxation. To be more specific — my YM status messages. Here are some of my status messages this past few days. :
My last name may be Hungarian but no, I don’t like sausage. (Not true, actually. I like sausage.)
“I feel drunk but I’m sober. I’m young and I’m underpaid. I’m tired but I’m working. Yeah!” (Hand in my Pocket, Alanis Morissette)
“It’s like 10,000 spoons when all you need is a DAMN knife.” (modified Ironic, Alanis Morissette)
Alanis Morissette is Canada’s greatest contribution to mankind.
When I was a kid, I thought I could make a deck of cards explode. You know, like Gambit. When my dad told me it was impossible, I packed my stuff and ran away. They found me in an arcade.
I hate bitchy people. They’re just, uh, bitchy.
This is when “work” becomes a verb. Oh please, Work, I like you better when you were a noun.
This is how it feels to pretend like I know what I’m writing about.
Waaaah! I really don’t know what I’m writing about.
When I don’t know what I’m writing about, I just… Damn, I really don’t know what I’m writing about.
I miss Vanessa Carlton. Damn. This is sooo… gay.
I miss oversleeping like I miss college. Damn, I can’t believe I miss college!
“Malas mo. Ikaw ang natipuhan ko.” (Oo, Up Dharma Down)
Gawd, again, I really don’t know what I’m writing about.
Mum, I’m telling you. It’s not just a phase! You see, I still like Baby Spice. And the rest of ‘em.
It’s weird that I like the Pussycat Dolls. I mean, I don’t like dolls. I don’t like cats. And I don’t like….
My ex-girlfriend and I wanted to hurt each other so badly. She dated my bestfriend. I dated her brother. I won.
Writing is like sex. It’s exciting. It’s exhausting. And I suck at it.
Before I end this, I just want to make it clear that the last item is NOT true. Absolutely false. Written just for humour. Haha. Defensive.
Status: We don’t fight fair
Music: The Takeover, The Break’s Over - Fall Out Boy
I can’t help noticing that since it takes me too long to update this blog, my entries get lengthier and lengthier. Uhm, I hate lengthy posts. I know they can get boring sometimes, so don’t worry, I promise that this one is not gonna be lengthy.
I was supposed to update this last night, but I got home at 3:30am, too tired to actually do anything but visit dreamland. Uh.
###
BLUSH, BABY, BLUSH!
One weird thing about me is that I easily blush. And whenever I do, it’s so obvious. I really turn red. I blush every time I feel embarrassed, ashamed or nervous. If I’m keeping a secret, say for example, the identity of this Mr. Perfect, you can easily know without me saying anything just by guessing who he really is. If you mention his name, I will surely blush right at that moment. And then, you’ll know.
Last week, I was gorging on some meal with a friend when my Mr. Perfect greeted me. My friend said I turned red instantly. Good thing my Mr. Perfect didn’t notice. (Or so I think.)
The other night, my friends were just talking about something, teasing me when I turned red. I couldn’t do anything but cover my face with my jacket or I’d have looked terribly stupid.
When I was in college, my friend Icang used to tell me how I would look silly when the person I admired so much back then was around. I would turn incredibly red.
And it’s not just blushing. When I blush, it’s like it comes with the whole package. I stutter, I get clumsy, and I act weird. Things I have no control over.
Heck, I need to do something about it. I know some of my readers are registered nurses so my educated guess is that you know the human body better than I do. Is there any way I can prevent blushing and other physiological manifestations of emotional geysers? Please, I need it right now. I don’t want to get myself in deep shameful shit.
How about you? Do you blush often? Or am I just really, er, abnormal?
###
THE DAYS BETWEEN TODAY AND BECOMING-A-DIPLOMAT DAY
And now, the question is, “Am I happy?” Hmmm. I’m relatively happy. The job is not as easy as I thought. Actually, it is. But it’s pretty stressful, too. My work runs from 7am to 4pm, and after office hours, you’ll find me in an arcade or bowling alley in Megamall just to get rid of the stress I have accumulated the whole day. Very, very high school.
I only have a few people that I get along with in the office — Bridget and Aika (whom I always go out with), Dana, Kristel, Paul and Jon (whom I always spend my cigarette breaks with). It’s funny because Christian, who sat next to me, had already quit the job for a Marketing position for some company — the jobs I turned my back on for this job.
Last Thursday, I got a call from another company offering me a position in Advertising and Promotions. You know how I used to hate the culture in the advertising field. Aika and Bridget told me to grab the chance. I did not. I was afraid their offer would be better than my current company, and would tempt me to quit this early for a better job. That’s just silly. I have just started and I’d be quitting that fast?
Last night, I was to meet my officemates Bridget, Aika, Dana, and Jon for a little drink. On my way to our meeting place from Shangrila Mall, I walked past EDSA Shangrila Hotel. One block away from me was this man in his early 30s, in his long-sleeved polo and blue tie. It was 7:30pm. As I continued walking, I began noticing that he was looking at me. And as the distance between us got shorter and shorter, he wouldn’t look away. He just maintained that eye contact that made me feel very uncomfortable. Two metres between us, he smiled.
I had a good look at him. Yep, thirty-something. Neat. Tall. Nice eyes. A little chubby. Very masculine but his aura sent signals of certain pinkness. Not overly handsome but cute. I continued walking.
In the middle of the pavement, I looked back. There he was standing still in front of the hotel, looking at me. And then he raised his hand and waved. I stopped walking. He ran towards me.
One metre between us, he stopped. He said, “Oh, I’m sorry. I think I’ve mistaken you for someone I know.” He flashed that gorgeous smile again.
I laughed a little, “A’right.”
And then, he stepped a little closer and said…. Oops, uhm, I’m sorry. Gawd, I’m doing it again. This post is long enough. I can’t write any longer. I promised you I would not post lengthy entries anymore. So, a’right, I better stop here. So there. Bye for now. Hehehe.
images courtsy of ryan-design.com, margomilne.com, and blogoscoped.com
Status: Wish I’ve done a little bit more
Music: Should Woulda Coulda - Beverly Knight
Wow, I realise that it’s taking me too long to update my blog lately. It’s been a very busy week and it makes me happy. Hehe. Aside from my day job, Tonet and I were able to close a screenwriting deal with an independent film producer. This would be the second full-length script that I sold. If I would continue being able to sell screenplays at the rate I’m going, I wouldn’t even need a day job. So you see, busy means money. Yum, yum.
Anyway, I noticed that it’s been a while since I last talked about my favourite topic in the world: myself. So since most of my readers don’t know me personally, let me tell you a few craps about myself.
My friends from the university and I were playing Charades and the theme was “movie titles.” When an opponent drew “Little Nicky,” we thought it was a giveaway. So when he started acting it out for his team, for the first word, he just levelled his palm at his hips and his team shouted “Little” right away. Hmmm. But “Nicky” was something less easy.
One of our team members was Monique, also known as Nikki. Monique is not the skinny type. She’s a bit, er… endomorphic. It didn’t come as a surprise to us when the player who was acting out pointed to Nikki for the second word. What we didn’t expect was when someone from his team shouted: “Pig? Little Pig?”
Mean. Mean. Mean.
# # #
One of our organisation’s applicants is this Japanese exchange student, Kazu. Kazu has been staying here in the Philippines since March. He takes up Philippine Studies. And we were surprised to find out that he was more fluent in Tagalog (our native language) than English. It was amazing, really. So one day, my friends and I had a small talk with Kazu.
Us: So Kazu, how do you find the Philippines? Kazu:Mainit. (Hot) Us: Oooh. Anything else? Kazu:Madaming bakla. (Gay men are all around.) Us: (laughing our guts out) Why? In Japan, are there no gay people? Kazu:Meron din. Pero hindi kasing-ingay. (There are. But not as noisy.) Us: Oh, it’s just here in this building. It’s just that we’re in the Mass Communication building so everyone just love… talking… out loud. Anything else? Kazu:Maraming gwapo. (Many goodlooking men.) Us: Oooh. How about the women? What can you say about the Filipinas? Kazu:Malaki suso. (They have huge breasts.)
Monique, who was with us, pretended to walk out. She claimed it hit home. As we looked around, we realised how Kazu had that impression. Yeah, with Monique, Maj, Sanya, and Bunggay around, we couldn’t really blame Kazu for making that pretty accurate observation.
# # #
Nina posted something like this on her blog last week, and I guess it’s my turn to explain a few things about my names. Yep, names. Plural. A’right. My real name is Edison. So why Yoshke? Yoshke is more like my pen and online name. I got the name from a Japanese animation “Wedding Peach.” Yoshke was one of the male characters; he was the heroine’s love interest. I liked his character in the series, so I chose that name. But of course, more than anything, I just really wanted to mock a Jewish friend. “Yoshke” is what Jews call JesusChrist.
When I’m at Starbucks, my name changes to Edward. Why Edward? When ordering coffee, they ask for your name, right? I used to give them my real name Edison, but the conversation always went like this:
Barrista: May I have your name, sir? Yoshke: Edison. Barrista: I’m sorry. Erickson? Yoshke: Edison. Barrista: Oh. Okay, Jason. Yoshke: Nah. Just write Ed. Barrista: Right. Ted.
I still don’t know if there was something wrong with the way I speak, or they all have hearing problems, or it’s just that here in this country Edison, although famous, is not a popular name. So I think it’s wise to just use Edward to save time and spit.
Most people call me E.S., my nickname. Why ES? I don’t know, either. But whenever someone asks me, I just tell them that because Edison means Edward’s Son in Old English. But that’s not really why I’m called ES. Rumor has it that E.S. means Erwin-Siony. Siony is my mum. And Erwin… is NOT my dad. My dad’s name is Benito. So who is this Erwin? He’s the man my mum had an affair with. (Yeah, I know, don’t mention it.) But I don’t buy that idea, and will not. I have my father’s nose, and I look like my cousins on my dad’s side. DNA testing is not necessary. I am a Dimen.
Dimen is my family name. It is of Hungarian/Romanian origin. Here in a country where family names are either Spanish or Filipino, having a “weird” family name is a curse especially for a kid. My playmates called me “demon” when angry. They would draw a picture of a devil and post it on the board and write my name on it. They would also tease me “di men.” In Tagalog, “di” means “not,” hence saying I was not man enough. And it was a big deal because as a kid, I was sickly and weak.
I got over it learning that having an unusual family name actually worked for me, and was something I could use to my advantage. My teachers would notice and remember me so easily upon seeing the class list. I thought it was nice. But although “Dimen” is a Hungarian/Romanian name, I don’t think we actually have East European blood. Or if we did, then there’s actually very little of it left in the family. My aunt, however, told me that one of my great grandparents was German. It makes sense. There are many Dimens in Germany. Whatever. But I think it’s cool. I looove the German National Football (Soccer) Team. Hahahaha.
On May 31, 1985, tragedy struck when 41 tornadoes hit Canada and the US, leaving 76 people dead. At the same time, a doomed couple in the Philippines were having the best orgasms of their lives. Nine months (280 days) later, a cute baby boy was born. That was exactly a week before Microsoft had its initial public offering.
Today, Yoshke Dimen resides independently in Quezon City. He got a degree in Film from an overrated university in Diliman but is now desperately trying to pursue a career in Foreign Service. To kill time, he amuses himself with idiotic thoughts by secretly observing other people's behaviours.
Fifteen years from now, he will make history as the youngest ambassador to the United Nations.
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Some short stories and / or other literary articles which are written by the blog owner are fiction. Names, characters, and incidents are product of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events or individuals is purely coincidental.
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