Before anything else, I’d like to thank Kevin, Vins, The Lady in Green Ruffles, Noah, and Jake for being the top commenters on this blog for 2009. Dahil dyan, may nagtext!

“Uy, ilibre mo naman kami one of these days bilang top commenters.”

Ay, DELETE! Sorry, blame my reflex. Wahaha!

…

So now let’s proceed to the real topic of this post — Twitter. I looooove Twitter so much better than Plurk. Plurk has its strengths but they don’t work for me. I have a Plurk account (Add me! Add me!) but its horizontal orientation drives me nuts.

Some say that the problem with Twitter is that it’s too simple. But I guess that’s exactly what made me a certified tweep — it’s simplicity. 140 characters. Linear. Simple. And not to mention it’s so flexible in terms of third-party applications.

Anyway, like always, when I’m running out of things to blog about, I just post my status messages here on my blog. So here are the things that ran through my head and kept me busy the past several days.

1. Minsan pag nalulungkot ako, nanonood ako ng GMA7. Gumagaan kasi ang loob ko pag nakikitang may mas pangit pa pala sa buhay ko. -Gege, 2009 | about 1 hour ago
2. Ampanget ng boyfriend ng ex-girlfriend ko. | about 13 hours ago
3. has just finished watching THE HURT LOCKER and THE BLIND SIDE. The former is so powerful, the latter so Hollywood. | about 14 hours ago
4. Dear Dick Gordon, I like you but the Silent Night jingle for your political ad is soooo last year. It’s 2010. Christmas is over. Move on. | 7:07 AM Jan 16th
5. Mamatay na ang mga sumisingit sa pila! | 1:19 AM Jan 16th
6. Tigilan ako ng Johann-Cathy-Hermes sh*t. Kaka-dinner ko lang. Ayoko masuka. #PBB |  6:34 AM Jan 15th
7. Ang ganda ng smile ni Carla Abellana. I hope she quits acting and stick to what seems like the only thing she’s good at — smiling. | 6:05 AM Jan 14th
8. RT @djmotwister: This just texted to me,gave me a bit of a laugh.Villar: Sipag at Tiyaga, Gibo: Galing at Talino, Noynoy: Mama at Papa. | 6:35 AM Jan 12th
9. DAVID GUETTA music before going to sleep para upbeat ang gising. Wut? | 9:32 AM Jan 11th
10. OMG. Suspended daw ang SHOWTIME ng 20 days??!? Dahil dyan, MAY NAGTEXT! Sabi, “Wahaha,” -Wilma Galvante. | 4:51 AM Jan 11th
11. loved Sarah Geronimo’s performance of TRY SLEEPING WITH A BROKEN HEART on ASAP. | 12:38 AM Jan 10th
12. Andre: Kaya pala maitim si Binay, kasi nasunugan sila nung bata siya. LOL! | 4:51 AM Jan 9th
13. is craving for isaw from UP. But i don’t live in QC anymore. Too bad. | 1:06 AM Jan 9th
14. Someone tried to insult me on my blog by slandering Muhammad. He thinks I’m a Muslim. When insulting me, insult me right. http://ow.ly/U91V | 2:33 AM Jan 8th
15. Friday always brings this wonderful feeling of hope, relief. Friday is like the light at the end of the tunnel! Haha. | 2:20 AM Jan 8th
16. My hubby is so cute, I don’t know what good I did to deserve him. Haha. | 5:02 AM Jan 7th
17. It’s been 2 months since my Ilocos trip but i still have a pack of Vigan longanisa in my fridge. | 2:07 AM Jan 7th
18. has the biggest pimple in the history of mankind. | 12:33 AM Jan 7th
19. My tummy is bigger than my ego. And I’m telling you, my ego IS big. | 7:15 PM Jan 5th
20. My nephew is beside me sleeping like a rock. Like a rock rolling down a volcano. Ang lakas humilik! | 8:58 AM Jan 3rd
21. Mom is giving me another lecture on my excessive use of aircon in my room. She has to understand that i get hot easily. Whut? | 8:00 AM Jan 3rd
22. has finished watching THE DAY THE EARTH STOOD STILL remake on cable. It’s so ugly, it’s criminal. | 7:37 AM Jan 3rd
23. I think I know why SHARON CUNETA is huge! Could she be stealing her daughters’ NIDO?! | 6:44 AM Dec 16th, 2009
24. I spend more time with MS Powerpoint than my boyfriend. I should marry Powerpoint. We’ll have cute deck babies! Busy, busy Wednesday! | 11:38 PM Dec 15th, 2009
25. I kinda miss the days when “lunch” is just lunch and not “working lunch.” Haha | 8:30 PM Dec 15th, 2009
26. is at UP Cineastes’ Studio Alumni Homecoming. Direks Joyce Bernal & Cathy Garcia Moliina are here, too! | 7:48 AM Dec 12th, 2009

There. So my blog post for this week is covered. I may now go back to being busy.

And oh, FOLLOW ME ON TWITTER! Also, post your Twitter usernames here and I will follow you.

I never expected I’d be writing you this letter. We’ve had four years of wonderful memories but I’m afraid it had come to the point where you started to break my heart. I should’ve seen it coming since I’ve been finding it hard to breathe lately. It’s time to end the pain that I’m feeling and I just have to say goodbye. I will truly miss you.

I’ve known you since I was a kid but it was only before my college graduation that we had a real relationship. At first, it was difficult for me to get along with you considering the nasty things some people say about you. They said you would hurt me, and you did. They said, if I continued spending time with you, it would be so hard to let go; it was.

True, you are all the bad things they were saying. Still, I accepted you. I let you get to me deep within. You’re smokin’ hot. I loved the feeling of your body in my mouth. I loved it when my lips touched your butt. You taste like euphoria. You reek of obsession.

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If you don’t understand why everyone is going ga-ga over that certain planner a certain coffeehouse is selling or giving away after you’ve turned fat, broke or insomniac, welcome to the club.

Well, there’s nothing wrong with it actually. If you always buy coffee, then it makes perfect sense to avail of the planner in question. In fact, I admire the passion and determination of others to the point of skipping lunch or dinner or both just to grab their copy of that planner every year. (I even know a couple of kids who ask money from their parents and claim it’s for a project for their Social Studies class. Social, alright.)

It’s a cool planner I must admit. If I were that into overpriced coffee, I’d probably get myself one, too. But I’m happy with my Kapeng Barako so, thanks, but no thanks.

Anyway, just as that coffeehouse everyone is ga-ga over releases their planner that everyone is ga-ga over, a couple of friends came up with a brilliant idea of producing their own planner that could give that “coffeehouse planner everyone is ga-ga over” a run for its overpriced life. It’s more like my friends’ personal project but they printed 498 more, so you might want to buy a copy. LOL.

So what is this ingenious planner that threatens the order of the society?

Well, it’s called the “I-was-supposed-to-get-that-coffeehouse-planner-but-I-got-fat-and-broke-on-the-10th-frappe planner.” Sorry for its quite lengthy name, but there’s no other name more suitable.

This mocking planner talks to you in Tagalog and treats you as a real friend, the kind you always suspect of being gay or schizophrenic. It does not give you boring inspirational quotes every page. Heck, it might even insult you, like a real friend. And on top of it all, like a real friend, it’s the one you’d like to use as much as you can.

It has art, it has wit, and you don’t have to buy 30 frakkin’ cups of coffee just to get it. You just have to shell out P320. See? Like a real friend, it’s cheap.

The picture above is the cover. Now, take a look at the inside pages:

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I’ve been wanting to write something lately but because the Typhoon Ondoy decided to be such a bitchass on the Philippines, priorities shifted and blogging just kissed the bottom of the list. (Btw, let’s continue helping the victims.)

Anyway, I realized that my last two entries on this blog are both very serious and very personal so I want to publish something light. I will post a storm-related entry one of these days, I just need to finish the article.

I was browsing through my pictures in my laptop when I stumbled upon old photos and screenshots. They say that a picture paints a thousand words. True, but wait there’s more. It’s also the easiest way to answer questions.

1. How good I am at bowling.

That’s four consecutive strikes, my dear friends. And one spare! (Yabang!) Just don’t ask me what happened after.

2. Why, for a moment, I was convinced God  is everywhere.

Imagine my surprise when this popped up on my screen. Apparently, it was just a friend named Jesus.

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When I was in Kindergarten, I once heard my teacher mention the word “Singapore.” At first, I didn’t know what it was. I thought it was a name for an animal or a fruit. But my innate curiosity pushed me to ask one of my neighbors what it was. What I got from her was not just an answer, explaining me that it was a beautiful place overseas, south of the Philippines. What I got was a dream — his dream, which later on became mine.

The truth is, I learned what Singapore was way before I learned the other parts of my own country. Since then, I’d always heard the word “Singapore” — from my parents, teachers, and family friends. And when they uttered the word Singapore, it was often accompanied by the words “beautiful,” “progressive,” “unique.”

Not just that, people had always used this tiny yet marvelous city as a benchmark for our country. When we came across a pile of garbage in our province, my mum would say, “Singapore is probably the cleanest country in the world.” Whenever my cousins and I would see people jaywalking and breaking traffic rules left and right in Manila, they’d say “They wouldn’t allow that in Singapore.” Even now that I’m all grown up, I still often hear Singapore as this country’s standard for almost everything — trade, business, waste management, urban planning.

I’ve never been out of the country but who could blame me if the first foreign city I’d like to set foot on is the first foreign land I had heard about when I was a kid — Singapore.

Take a look at my friend’s pictures taken when she was in Singapore:

Boy did that made me feel my ultimate sin was envy! Haha. My other friends and I have planned going to Singapore countless times but none of them pushed through for reasons ranging from financial to schedule. But now that I have this chance of finally seeing the unique city I’ve always dreamed of experiencing, make no mistake, I won’t let it pass without a good fight.

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Question: When does crunch time become Krunch time?

Answer: When the temperature starts to drop, lights start to flicker, strange sounds of footsteps are heard from an empty room, and you start having goosebumps. That’s when crunch time turns into Krrunch Time!

Last Thursday, five colleagues and I decided to spend the rest of the night at the office. It was a pretty stressful night since everyone was trying to meet the deadline set in the morning of the next day. Since the entire team was desperate to make it but still had tons of codes to fix and paperwork to do, staying in the office overnight was a completely wise decision.

Working for a mobile multimedia company, we are used to late-night working hours. A number of us choose to finish a project before going home every once in a while. Some of them have sworn to have heard strange noises from the control room. Oh yeah, the Control Room — where the light switches, Internet servers, and most of the stored documents are located. It is also the first room from the front door. You see, you’re gonna have to pass by this room to reach the work stations.

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image courtesy of warkitty.com

One December evening in Paranaque, Andre, Dane and I were killing time by solving puzzles that I compiled in my head since I was a little boy. You see, I love solving puzzles and challenging my friends to put their problem-solving skills to a test. It was one of those nights. We spent hours solving the detective stories I throw at them. Mind you, they were very difficult puzzles.

Just before daybreak, Dane said:

Dane: I am used to simple puzzles like the giraffe-elephant-fridge puzzle.
Yoshke: What’s that puzzle?
Andre: OMG! You don’t know that?
Yoshke: No. Everyone else does?
Andre: Yep. So give it a try.
Dane: Alright, Yoshke, in three steps, how do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator?
Yoshke: Hmmm.

Hmmmmm…

I spend twenty minutes trying to figure it out. When I blurted, “Don’t tell me it’s ‘Open the ref, put the giraffe, and then close it.’”

They laughed their asses off.

Hey, I was expecting a serious puzzle and this silly puzzle just caught me off-guard!

Andre: How about this: In four steps, how do you put an elephant into a refrigerator?
Yoshke: (confident) (1) Open the door. (2) Move the giraffe aside. (3) Put the elephant inside. (4) Close the door.

Andre and Dane: WRONG!
Yoshke: Seriously? What’s the right answer?
Andre and Dane: (1) Open the door. (2) Take out the giraffe. (3) Put the elephant inside. (4) Close the door.

Yoshke: But I wanted to just move the giraffe aside!
Andre: Well you can’t! You have to remove the giraffe!
Yoshke: WHY?!!?
Dane: Because it won’t fit!

With that, I snapped!

Yoshke: HOW DARE YOU DICTATE HOW BIG MY REFRIGERATOR IS!!! I MANAGED TO PUT THE DARN GIRAFFE INTO IT; OF COURSE IT CAN ACCOMMODATE AN ELEPHANT!

Alright, so I took that puzzle too seriously. Wahaha.

We all love puzzles. Some people can endure trying to solve one puzzle game and not give up even if they end up hating themselves and hitting someone else for failing to solve it.

Whether it’s just a short detective quiz that a friend has shared or a simple anagram or even a mere puzzling question, we always try to solve them and share them with others. Today, most people are going crazy over sodoku, a puzzle originated in Japan and took the world by storm.

image courtesy of sentimentalrefugee.com

Why do most people love puzzles? Maybe it’s because it is human nature to always ask why or how. Maybe it’s because we love the feeling of being up for the challenge. Maybe it’s the sense of pride and accomplishment when we are able to solve one. Maybe it’s because puzzles divert our attention and escape the real world.

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One of the first books I received was a children’s bible. It was small, red, and a little too thin for a bible.

Of course, as a kid the first thing I did upon receiving it was scan it and see the pictures. On every page was an image and a short story. My uber-Catholic parents and siblings used to read me biblical stories to sleep. (Oh yes, I grew up in a so very Catholic environment and look how I turned out, haha, agnostic, gay and reckless). Thus, I recognized some of those stories instantly — Adam and Eve, Cain and Abel, Noah, Abraham, Jacob — so I didn’t bother reading them.

What caught my attention was the story after Jacob’s. There was a picture of a kid being pulled up a well, and in the background were several men and a caravan. I read it and fell in love with it right away. It was the first story I read on my own. The story — Joseph, the Dreamer.

I admire Joseph. I’m in love with him. He is kind. He is vengeful. He is human. And in my head, he’s hot.

Also, “dreams” fascinate me the way porn does. Not that I like porn. Yeah, I do, who doesn’t? But I meant, how it fascinates other people. Yeah, dreams fascinate me the way porn fascinates other people. Haha. Nagmalinis daw.

Anyway, I’ve been dreaming a lot recently. And I sorta remember those dreams even up to now. So I’m reminded of Joseph once again. But unlike Joseph, I’m not really good at interpreting dreams. Anyone here who’d like to play Joseph and try to figure out what my dreams mean?

If you’re right, I’ll give you.. err… nothing. If you’re right, good for you.

Here are the dreams:

MUTE USHERS AND A BROKEN CELLPHONE

There was a blogger event at Star Mall parking lot. I’m assuming it was Star Mall because I could see an overpass leading to SM Megamall from where I was seated. One of the ushers was a college friend. For this narrative’s sake, let’s call him Joseph. Well, so Joseph was an usher but ushers were not allowed to talk. He was wearing this weird usher uniform which resembled a London guard. He approached me and he said that I won a cellphone. I was confused because I didn’t even join any contest or raffle. Without talking, he was able to let me know that he was not allowed to talk any more. So he walked me to the overpass. Once there, the organizers gave me a high-end phone but it had a girl-ish decoration, something like flower stickers. Worse, it didn’t have a battery. I asked why the phone was like that but no one would talk. So I left and sat again. And then, I woke up.

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Hey guys, work-related lang. Please post your own top 3 things by commenting on this post. Please, please, please. Or you may also post it on your own blog. 

Just write down the Top 3 stuff that the category asks. Thanks. Heto saken.

TOP 3 FEEL-GOOD MOVIES (HOLLYWOOD)

1. Love Actually
2. Slumdog Millionaire
3. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
OR The Devil Wears Prada
OR My Best Friend’s Wedding (andami, ahaha)

TOP 3 FEEL-GOOD MOVIES (ANIMATION)

1. Finding Nemo
2. Monsters Inc.
3. Wall E!

TOP 3 FEEL-GOOD MOVIES (PINOY)

1. Crying Ladies
2. Got 2 Believe
3. Jologs / You Changed My Life

TOP 3 FEEL-GOOD MOVIES (FOREIGN LANGUAGE)

1. Amelie
2. My Sassy Girl
3. Love of Siam — hindi masyado happy ending pero eeeh, feel good pa rin

TOP 3 BEACHES YOU’VE BEEN TO AND WHY

1. Puerto Princesa, Palawan — clear water, awesome place. not crowded
2. Matabungkay, Batangas – Mababaw lang ang tubig sa ibang parts, tas ok mag snorkel sa iba
3. Sorsogon – may butanding! ahihihi

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