And That’s the Bottom Line!

Posted on January 11, 2010 by Yoshke in Conversations, Friends, Humor |

Here are some completely innocent statements but my friends’ dirty minds tell them otherwise.

SANAY NA

One very toxic night, I had been editing political ads on my laptop with my small marketing teammates at our apartment FOR HOURS. My friends Dohna, Dane, and Frances were sitting on the airbed while I was on the stairs facing a chair where the laptop was on. There was just no place in the mattress left so I had to sit on the bottom step of the staircase despite the discomfort.

Dohna grew concerned about my situation so she asked, “Yoshke, masakit ba?”

And without thinking, I replied, “Hindi naman. Sanay na ang pwet ko.”

Everyone burst into laughter. I meant I got used to being seated for hours.

PUMAPASOK

Frances, Dohna, Asta, JT, Maikel and I were at Starbucks Shangri-la last Thursday night when we agreed to exchange horror stories. Frances was narrating a horrifying encounter when they stayed in Baguio a few years ago, wherein an old lady was torturing her in her sleep but she was awake and she couldn’t move. More like a case of sleep paralysis.

Frances narrated, “Tapos hindi talaga ako makagalaw. Tapos gusto kong sumigaw pero hindi ko magawa, walang lumalabas na boses. Tapos weird, ang hirap ng i-explain. Alam nyo yung feeling na may malaking bagay na pumapasok sa katawan mo?“

“Oo, alam ko ang feeling nang may malaking bagay na pumapasok sa katawan ko,” I interrupted.

Everyone gave me a look as if saying “You ruined dinner.” Sorry naman. She asked! I just answered. I meant I had the same sleep paralysis experience.

HINDI QUALIFIED

While preparing dinner at the condo a few months ago.

Andre: Pag nagkaroon ng Top Chef Philippines, parang ang sarap sumali. Kaso hindi ako qualified.
Yoshke: Bakit naman?
Andre: Hindi kasi ako “top.”

He meant he’s not that experienced a cook!

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Protected: Faux Arrogance

Posted on March 17, 2009 by Yoshke in Conversations, Friends, Humor, Rants, TV |

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Posted!

Posted on February 27, 2009 by Yoshke in Humor, Whatnots |

I’m sharing an apartment with two college friends: Glenn — straight, artistic, weird man; and Frances — asexual, artistic, weird woman. Living with them is like living with, well, weird people. But I loove ‘em both. Hehe. I love ‘em both coz I seldom see them. Wahaha. Kidding.

And since we don’t regularly see one another, what have become our major means of communication are the ever-reliable post-it notes.

A couple o’ weeks ago. On the kitchen corkboard.

And because my room’s doorknob was jammed. The other night. On the door.

Wehehehehe.

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Heart Check-up

Posted on July 8, 2007 by Yoshke in Friends, Love |

Status: In Pain
Music: Look After You – The Fray

I just received the most ridiculous text message from Frances:

“Sudden realisation. I think you’re in love with Astrid. I don’t know, it just entered my mind.”

What the..?! Where did this come from?! Asta is an incredibly good friend. Yes, she’s very special to me, considering the ups-and-downs that we’ve been through. We’ve experienced the worst in our friendship. We hated each other so much, and now, we’re good friends. We’re close, but nowhere close to having a romantic relationship. Really.

Anyways, I’ve been doing a lot of thinking about the condition of my heart lately. And I realised something:

The truth is: B1* is the reason I smile everyday. But B2* is still the reason I cry at night. Damn.

Considering that it’s been more than a year since B2 hurt me, I just can’t get over it. I want to be angry at him but he’s too cute to be mad at. Gawd, I hate myself. I hate what happened. And until now, I still haven’t forgiven him, myself, and the other guy. But it pains me that they seem to have moved on, and now, I’m the only one left in pain. It’s just… painful. And sad. Good thing B1 is here. Obicham Te, B1.

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