Another Weekend With Andre

FRIDAY NIGHT (February 6)

Sa MRT Ayala Station. While waiting for TP Winwin who was at a reloading station, we couldn’t decide where to go and what to do…

Yoshke: O ano nang kyeme natin?
Andre: Depende nga sayo kung kekyeme tayo. Eh di ba nga may kyeme kang hinihintay?
Yoshke: OK lang naman sa akin kahit ano.
Andre: So kekyeme nga tayo? Kasi kung hindi tayo kekyeme, uuwi na ko. Dito lang naman sakayan ko.
Yoshke: Gusto mo bang kumyeme?
Andre: Gusto kong kumyeme kasi ayoko pang umuwi. Eh ikaw nga? Anong kyeme mo?
Yoshke: May kyeme lang ako. Kung kekyeme tayo, san tayo kekyeme? Eh yun lang naman ang kyeme ko.
Andre: Sa Sidebar nga tayo kekyeme.
Yoshke: Sige, kyeme na tayo.

Akalain mong nagkaintindihan kami nun!

SATURDAY MORNING (January 31)

Andre went up to my room. He just woke up. I’d been listening to Kelly Clarkson for almost an hour already when he came in.

Andre: I gargled with Astring-O-Sol. I poured the liquid to the cap up to the brim and gargled.
Yoshke: Full cap? Up to the brim? It’s Astring-O-Sol CONCENTRATED! You’re supposed to mix it with water!
Andre: I know. I found out the moment I put it in my mouth. I can’t feel my mouth right now.
Yoshke: Wahaha. Next time, sabi nga ni Dyan Castillejo sa NIDO commercial, it pays to check the label!
Andre: I DID check the label! Eh malay ko bang seryoso pala sya.

Hala. So may labels na nagjo-joke lang?

SATURDAY NIGHT (January 31)

My housemate Glenn emerged from his room about to go out. Andre and I were at the living area.

Yoshke: Glenn, you having dinner?
Glenn: Yes.
Yoshke: I’m going with you. I wanna have dinner now.
Andre: Look at you, you’re so selfish. I thought we’re friends! You didn’t even consider me. I’m hungry, too, you know.
Yoshke: I did consider you.
Andre: You said “I’m going with you.”
Yoshke: Well, yeah… but I meant the two of us.
Andre: How? You said “I’m going with you…” I, I… Singular pronoun!
Yoshke: I meant the two of us coz… *isip ng palusot* Coz… Coz… Coz you’re already a part of me.

WTF! Wahaha.

SUNDAY MORNING (February 1)

Andre felt bad when my friend and housemate Frances left to check on her cats. Frances has new future-siopao cats but since another housemate Dane and I are allergic to fur, every furry creature that walks through our door gets thrown out the window. We’re on fourth floor. In other words, no cats allowed inside the apartment.

Anyways, so Andre was feeling abandoned by Frances. That afternoon, we got to talk about it.

Andre: Where is Frances now?
Yoshke: She said she’s taking care of her cat somewhere.
Andre: I feel betrayed! BETRAAAYED! She dumped me for her “pest.”Β  (pause) I meant “pets.”

I threw him a Mark-of-Ugly-Betty look.

Andre: What? I’M DYSLEXIC!!!

SUNDAY NIGHT (February 1)

Sa Starbucks, Trinoma. Dun sa misty at parang gubat.

Yoshke: Andre, what’s the political symbol for the Democrats?
Andre: Donkey. Ass. Coz they are asses.
Dohna: And the Republicans?
Yoshke: Elephant
Dohna: Why elephant?
Andre: Coz they’re much bigger asses.

May point ka dyan, Andre. May point ka.

Comments

  1. what’s kyeme?

    nakakatawa talaga ang weekend with Andre.. by the way i love cats, pero hinahaching na ko after makipaglaro dun sa dalawa kong alaga.

    kamusta naman na ang bibig ni Andre, after the “astring-o-sol experience’?
    hehe.

    hi Yoshke, as always, reading mode.:)

  2. hahhaa. okay. i dont want to ask what kyeme means. but hey! nice flow of convos with random scenarios lol. and yes, i think thats why Democrats are donkeys hahaha (or they’re illegal immigrants from Mexico lol)

  3. after grueling hours inside the classroom, i read this and it made my day. haha. nagka intindihan kayo sa “kyeme” yoshke, unbelievable. ang galing mo gumawa ng palusot, so witty. haha!

    to andre, do check the label. haha! i’ve tried doing it though, gaah! it’s like my tongue is gonna fall out.

    have a good day yoshke. another good post. πŸ™‚

  4. grabe. di ko na magawang mag-aral since i’ve encountered this site. haha. peace yoshke, di naman kita sinisisi. haha.

    aantabayanan ko ang susunod mong post.

    -your avid reader,
    Noah (ahehe)

    • Next time you go to a supermarket and see a bottle of Astring-O-Sol Concentrated, remember, always remember that there’s a certain guy living in Paranaque named Andre…

      • Taga-P’que pala si AndrΓ©? My best friend (or best sister as you put it. lol) also lives in P’que. Dati sila sa Better Living, ngayon nasa Don Bosco Village na. πŸ™‚

    • NO! I DON’T “HADA!”

      haha. Seriously. I’m not like that.

      Kyeme doesn’t have a fixed meaning. Like Kevin said, “Kyeme is much like churva. Its meaning depends on the context of your conversation. It may or may not be perverted.”

      But in this case, KYEME means to booze. That’s all. πŸ˜›

  5. so kyeme at that time means iinom kayo. ah. i have a girl friend who says “churva” a lot of times. like “chumochurva nanaman kami” meaning nag iingay or something, it really depends on when or how you use it. napaka random ng meaning at times. hahaha.

    but what does “hada” means?

  6. wtf is kyeme? this is funny. had me in stitches? is andrei ur bff? lolz! i love his train of thot. donkeys and elephants. i’ll remember that. lolz!

  7. hahahaha! this post is so hilarious! hahaha! esp. this line–I meant the two of us coz… *isip ng palusot* Coz… Coz… Coz you’re already a part of me.

    hahaha! baka madevelop ka na kay andre πŸ˜›
    peace out!

  8. interesting… there are a lot of Filipino words that have evolved.. marami na bukod sa kyeme. pero nakapagtataka talaga na nagkakaintindihan ang henerasyon ngayon sa mga salitang ito…

  9. and JIBA!…

    i learned it back here in uplb..

    haha.. .JIBA talaga si andre. haha πŸ˜€

    hi yoshke, in fairness naman, nakakapagaral na ulit ako (yes, ulit????) ..

    and thanks ulet sa pagbisita ng aking simpleng (ehem) blog.

  10. Andre: Where is Frances now?
    Yoshke: She said she’s taking care of her cat somewhere.
    Andre: I feel betrayed! BETRAAAYED! She dumped me for her β€œpest.β€? (pause) I meant β€œpets.β€?

    I threw him a Mark-of-Ugly-Betty look.

    Andre: What? I’M DYSLEXIC!!!

    —–

    Ngayon ko lang to napansin. I love it. LOL

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