Every night I hope to see him in my dreams. It does happen sometimes. Rarely. And in those elusive dreams, he was always so distant. He wouldn’t speak or even come near me.
The other night, there was another child in my dream. This boy wasn’t my nephew. He was a bit older, and he looked different.
Then he hugged me.
And when he did, I immediately recognized that warmth, that comfort, that love. When he hugged me, I knew it was him. It was my baby. It felt so good.
I know my mind just made it all up and that none of it was real. But for someone who doesn’t believe in the afterlife — I don’t think I will ever see him again — these dreams are all I have.
Most nights, like tonight, I can’t sleep. But I’m always patiently waiting.