From Conversations

Private and personal conversations made public.

Awkward

THE MAN IN THE OFFICE RESTROOM Last Thursday, I entered the washroom but the two urinals were already taken so I figured I’d just use a cubicle. As I was walking towards the stalls, I accidentally knocked over a Starbucks tumbler sitting on the sink. It didn’t hit the floor but it made a loud noise still. One of the guys at the urinals turned in my direction. OMG. OMG. OMG. It was the cute guy I always see in the same restroom almost every day. I had told my officemate about him a number of times. There was a…

How My Friends See Me II: Mastering Vanilla Sex?

What’s wrong with my friends? They’ve been so very imaginative lately; they’re accusing me of things. Things that are, well, pretty amusing. Very recently, they, albeit separately, came up with an interesting theory. More like a guess, actually. ROBIN While malling. A few months ago. Robin: I kinda miss the “bossy” you. Yoshke: Hey, I was never bossy. Robin: You were. You are. It’s just today that you seem to be not that. Yoshke: Must be the weather. Robin: What about the weather? Yoshke: Humid. Makes me feel sleepy. Robin: I bet you’re also bossy in bed. Yoshke: OMG. If…

Recycled Conversations II: College Moments

Some of the most bloggable conversations I had with my friends in our thesis days (2 years ago). Allow me to repost them. (And oh, ngayon lang yata ako magta-Tagalog sa blog ko nang bonggang bongga since I got my .com account.) DOHNA Nung Friday night, hindi dapat ako pupunta sa rehearsals nina Dohna and Glenn. Dumaan lang ako sa Aldaba Hall para sana magpaalam na manonood na lang ako ng Close To You, starring John Lloyd Cruz, Bea Alonzo and Sam Milby. Sa labas pa lang, nakita ko na si Dohna. Sabi ko, “Hoy Dohna, may sasabihin ako sa’yo…”…

The Line That Must Not Be Crossed

Another short conversation with a friend over Yahoo Messenger. Yoshke: Done reading? Friend: Aye aye. Sweet. Mushy. Yoshke: Should I say “Thanks?” Friend: lol. How come all your short, short, short stories are about friends falling in love? Yoshke: NOT ALL. Just the ones I post on my blog. Friend: Tell me, are you in love with a friend? Yoshke: No. 🙂 Friend: Don’t tell me it’s me. Yoshke: Whoah, is it just me or it really turned windy here? Friend: You’re corny. Yoshke: And you’re presumptuous! Assuming much? Friend: So why the fascination? Yoshke: I just love writing about it…

How My Friends See Me: Twisted Impressions

Last week at the apartment… Glenn: Do you have a copy of the first three seasons of House? Yoshke: The first two are with Dohna. You’re addicted, aren’t ye? Glenn: Yeah. (He paused a bit and then continued talking.) Every time I see Dr. House, I am reminded of you. No offence meant. Yoshke: None taken. Haha. May I know why? Glenn: You’re both sarcastic. Yoshke: Damn, I thought you’d say we’re both brilliant. Hahaha. Laughter. Silence. Yoshke: But, you know, it takes wit to be sarcastic. So I’ll take that. Haha. … Last year in Robin’s car, on the…

Top 18 Most Annoying Types of People (Part 1)

Humans are social animals. This means that we have to live both as individuals and as members of a group. Sometimes, however, we just find ourselves not getting along well with some types of people. No matter how much we try, we find it extremely difficult to like some people for reasons ranging from little nasty habits to utter viciousness. Throughout the day, we encounter countless types of people. While some are truly delightful, others are just plain vexatious. They may be our friends or family but there are just something we love to hate about them. Here are the…

Why Nursery Rhymes Are So Violent

A few months ago, I was teaching my 4-year old nephew some nursery rhymes with a DVD. After a lot of singing, he slowly digested the story that the rhymes tell. And then he began asking rather uncomfortable questions. One of the first rhymes I taught him was Humpty Dumpty. Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall, Humpty Dumpty had a great fall. All the King’s horses, And all the King’s men Couldn’t put Humpty together again! He might have finally understood the rhyme when he gasped and said curiously, “Did he die?” “Well,” I replied, “he’s an egg. Who cares?”…

The Winding Road

“I think you’re 80% straight.” I was startled by these ridiculous words from my friend Chemae. We were walking back to the cottage at a resort in my hometown in Batangas. The conversation went like this: Yoshke: Well, that remaining 20% makes me totally gay. 1% can make someone gay, you know. Chemae: I think in time, you’ll go straight again. Yoshke: You think so? I doubt that. Chemae: Aila (our common friend) warned me about you. Yoshke: Warned you about me? Chemae: She thinks you’re just pretending to be gay when you are really straight. Wahahaha. That was officially…